Escape Artists

The Lounge at the End of the Universe => Gallimaufry => Topic started by: Boggled Coriander on April 16, 2010, 12:24:13 AM

Title: Jennifer stood there, quietly ovulating.
Post by: Boggled Coriander on April 16, 2010, 12:24:13 AM: As I've mentioned before, the Lyttle Lytton contest (http://adamcadre.ac/lyttle.html) has the ability to reduce me to a helpless, giggling mass for several minutes on end.

The 2010 winners (http://adamcadre.ac/10lyttle.html) are out. My day has already gotten off to a good start. Here are some of my favorites (though without Adam's wonderful commentary):

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“You are the greatest human in the world,” the dragon told the boy who desperately wanted to be a dragon, too.

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“Hearken,” he spake, drawing thither, “and alight thine eyes on yon comely maiden betwixt such knaves as they.”

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“Great Caesar’s Ghost!” Amy sputtered. “What glorious lovemaking!”
Title: Re: Jennifer stood there, quietly ovulating.
Post by: Heradel on April 16, 2010, 12:37:13 AM: Quote from: Boggled Coriander on April 16, 2010, 12:24:13 AM
The 2010 winners (http://adamcadre.ac/10lyttle.html) are out. My day has already gotten off to a good start.

And they look like a good way for me to end mine, thanks.
Title: Re: Jennifer stood there, quietly ovulating.
Post by: Talia on April 16, 2010, 01:28:54 AM: "Tuesday. Africa. Lion o’clock. "

I must say, I think the right writer could make a hell of a story from that :P

_{_{(Jesus christ its Lion o'clock, get in the car!)}}
Title: Re: Jennifer stood there, quietly ovulating.
Post by: stePH on April 16, 2010, 04:52:39 PM: Quote from: Boggled Coriander on April 16, 2010, 12:24:13 AM
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“Hearken,” he spake, drawing thither, “and alight thine eyes on yon comely maiden betwixt such knaves as they.”

Is that from one of Robert Jordan's books? :D
Title: Re: Jennifer stood there, quietly ovulating.
Post by: stePH on April 17, 2010, 06:41:27 PM: This one is brilliant... the comment really makes it.

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Once upon a time, there was a talking lamp whose lightbulb fell out and hit a person and the person got shocked and destroyed everything. Megan Groppe

This is such an uncanny recreation of the way five-year-olds tell stories that I assume that the Axe Cop audience would buy up the entire first printing.
Title: Re: Jennifer stood there, quietly ovulating.
Post by: Bdoomed on April 17, 2010, 06:59:06 PM: My favorite is this one, and the comment makes it better. It's from 2008.
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Under Bob’s fez was another.

Jeff Marr

I like that one because it feels like it's missing a word, but then it takes a moment to figure out what it would be, and then once you've figured it out you realize that adding it would make the sentence even worse. I don't know why that kind of conundrum amuses me, but it does.
Title: Re: Jennifer stood there, quietly ovulating.
Post by: Alasdair5000 on April 17, 2010, 07:55:16 PM: Quote from: Talia on April 16, 2010, 01:28:54 AM
"Tuesday. Africa. Lion o’clock. "

I must say, I think the right writer could make a hell of a story from that :P

_{_{(Jesus christ its Lion o'clock, get in the car!)}}

I actually hear Simon Pegg saying this in his action voice from Hot Fuzz:) 'LION'O'CLOCK.'
Title: Re: Jennifer stood there, quietly ovulating.
Post by: Planish on May 05, 2010, 03:38:27 AM: My favourite finalist in the Noir genre (many years ago) has something along the lines of "... as his eyes slid slowly down the front of her dress."

Eeuw.
Title: Re: Jennifer stood there, quietly ovulating.
Post by: gateaux on July 02, 2010, 04:18:44 AM: ahahahaha that made my night!
Title: Re: Jennifer stood there, quietly ovulating.
Post by: Faraway Ray on July 20, 2010, 04:46:41 PM: Gotta agree that the "lion o'clock" line was bloody awesome. :)