I think Ben did a good job reading the story -- he really is quite talented with accents. And also he did a good job with the way the narrator related his wife's voice to the reader. But toward the end, in the climax, it sort of fell down a bit, as if he was getting a little bored with the material. I think the matter-of-fact delivery contributes to that.
Alasdair... were you ill this week? Just wondering. You sounded ill. (Does that line make me sound stalkerish? I hope not.)
As for the story... well... I think the scariest part wasn't the supernatural part. It was the fact that all of us can imagine what we would do if we were robbed, and the way this dude was treated by the robbers, plus the fact that he was naked at the time, is really extremely scary.
At least I know if it was my basement, I'd have time to get some sort of blunt instrument, because there's so much detritus scattered around that the robbers would trip and fall on their asses.
The supernatural aspect, I think, might not have actually been necessary. If I had written the story, I might have made the narrator into the monster. And maybe he was. Maybe the thing that split from him WAS just another part of his personality. I don't know. But the way the author did it was effective, and the story accomplished what the author set out to do, I think.
One thing that bothered me about this story - why were the robbers identified as "black men"? There's absolutely no physical details on them at all - other than their race. Which is made reference to more than once. In a context that made it feel a simple as - black men = criminals. Now, you could say that since this was a 1st person narrative, it could reflect the narrator's bias rather than the story's. But I don't think that's the case, since, well, there's nothing in the story pulling in any other direction. I'm not saying that the men needed to be white or something. Just that I don't see why even specify a race for them.
I was thinking about that, and perhaps the reason was "so Ben could use his accent powers"?
I'm guessing the author used that characterization because, given the surfeit of black criminals in contemporary televised fiction, it's something people can identify with. I do think the story would've been just as strong if they'd been white, or Asian, or Latino, but because the stereotype has been beaten into our heads by the media, I think the author used it BECAUSE it evokes vivid images and feelings.