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  • Voting has started for the Podcastle Flash Fiction contest. Anyone who has made at least one post should be able to see the stories down in the Arcade.

    New groups are posted every two days through the end of April.

News

Voting has started for the Podcastle Flash Fiction contest. Anyone who has made at least one post should be able to see the stories down in the Arcade.

New groups are posted every two days through the end of April.

Author Topic: EP763: No Spaceship Go  (Read 526 times)

divs

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on: December 19, 2020, 07:45:29 PM
Escape Pod 763: No Spaceship Go

Author: Annie Bellet
Narrator: Andrew K. Hoe
Host: Tina Connolly
Audio Producer: Adam Pracht

No Spaceship Go was originally published in Dailysciencefiction.com in November 2010.

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The boys lay on their backs side by side staring up through the open roof of the abandoned building. Dylan clutched Meek’s hand in anticipation as the ground shook and a roar filled the air. Tiny pebbles danced up from the ground around them and dust ran like water off the crumbling walls.

“Ten… nine… eight… seven… six… five,” Dylan whispered, “four… three… two… one.”

The shaking increased and he had to release Meek’s hand to shade his eyes. Smoke billowed up into the air, a streak of fire ahead of it. Then the true sonic blast of the rocketship hit them in a wave as the boys squinted to make out the ship speeding through the atmosphere. It sounded like the crackling of a hundred fires, or perhaps the blast of the biggest blowtorch Dylan could imagine.

Meek whooped and crawled to his knees, staring up into the sky.

“Do you think that’s the one we’ll be on someday?” he asked Dylan.

Dylan rolled to his side and propped himself up on one arm. Dust had accumulated on Meek’s round, tan cheeks and Dylan fought the urge to wipe it away.

“Nah, by the time we’ve saved enough to get our home on Elle Four, the ships’ll all be new I bet. We’ll ride on a superfast one for sure.”

“I want to grow peppers.” Meek smiled up at Dylan, his crooked teeth warping the line of his chapped lips.

“What kind of peppers?” Dylan grinned back. They’d had variations of this conversation before and Dylan didn’t pay much attention to Meek as the boy launched into his usual daydream about gardens and pepper plants.

Dylan daydreamed about something else entirely as he fixated on Meek’s lips, his eyes drifting to the dimple in his friend’s left cheek. He didn’t notice at first that Meek had stopped talking and instead stared up at him with those dark, nearly pupil-less eyes.

“Oh, hmm? I’m sorry.” Dylan murmured.

“Pebble for your thoughts?” Meek smiled again.




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Álex Souza

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Reply #1 on: January 10, 2021, 03:16:48 AM
This story didn't work for me I'm afraid.

There's a lack of conflict in the beginning of the story. Everything goes smoothly, there are no obstacles, just exposition. The actual conflict just starts practically at the midpoint.

MC's parents are very bland. I liked to see that they were Korean, but that doesn't affect the story. The story tells about United Korea, but it also doesn't add to the plot. I didn't see the point.

In fact, both families are stereotypical: the Asian parents are harsh and intelligent, whereas the hispanics are poor and have a lot of kids that don't have enough to eat.

I had a hard time sympathizing with the characters. I just didn't get invested. Everything feels so... emotionless. I couldn't grasp any feelings among the writing. There's a part when MC just bursts, "I hate both of you. Why are you trying to ruin my life?". It felt so off that made me cringe.

It's just so weird that they are sixteen. They behave and talk like little kids. I thought they were eight, or ten, tops, until MC's mother said their age. I'm still wondering why they are so childish.

The reason why the mother didn't want Dylan to date a Jewish girl is a mystery to me.

I liked the ending though. I like how simple it is. It is great in its simplicity. But a story isn't made just by its ending.

I just wanna go pro before AI takes over and the bot dogs from Boston Dynamics kill us all.