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Author Topic: Jennifer stood there, quietly ovulating.  (Read 3908 times)
Boggled Coriander
Lochage
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« on: April 15, 2010, 07:24:13 PM »

As I've mentioned before, the Lyttle Lytton contest has the ability to reduce me to a helpless, giggling mass for several minutes on end.

The 2010 winners are out.  My day has already gotten off to a good start.  Here are some of my favorites (though without Adam's wonderful commentary):

Quote
“You are the greatest human in the world,” the dragon told the boy who desperately wanted to be a dragon, too.

Quote
“Hearken,” he spake, drawing thither, “and alight thine eyes on yon comely maiden betwixt such knaves as they.”

Quote
“Great Caesar’s Ghost!” Amy sputtered. “What glorious lovemaking!”
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"The meteor formed a crater, vampires crawling out of the crater." -  The Lyttle Lytton contest
Heradel
Bill Peters, EP Assistant
Hipparch
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Part-Time Psychopomp.


« Reply #1 on: April 15, 2010, 07:37:13 PM »

The 2010 winners are out.  My day has already gotten off to a good start.

And they look like a good way for me to end mine, thanks.
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I Twitter. I also occasionally blog on the Escape Pod blog, which if you're here you shouldn't have much trouble finding.
Talia
Moderator
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Posts: 2505


I like pie


« Reply #2 on: April 15, 2010, 08:28:54 PM »

"Tuesday. Africa. Lion o’clock. "

I must say, I think the right writer could make a hell of a story from that Tongue



(Jesus christ its Lion o'clock, get in the car!)
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stePH
Actually has enough cowbell.
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Cool story, bro!


« Reply #3 on: April 16, 2010, 11:52:39 AM »

Quote
“Hearken,” he spake, drawing thither, “and alight thine eyes on yon comely maiden betwixt such knaves as they.”

Is that from one of Robert Jordan's books?  Cheesy
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"Nerdcore is like playing Halo while getting a blow-job from Hello Kitty."
-- some guy interviewed in Nerdcore Rising
stePH
Actually has enough cowbell.
Hipparch
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Posts: 3781

Cool story, bro!


« Reply #4 on: April 17, 2010, 01:41:27 PM »

This one is brilliant... the comment really makes it.

Quote
Once upon a time, there was a talking lamp whose lightbulb fell out and hit a person and the person got shocked and destroyed everything.   Megan Groppe

This is such an uncanny recreation of the way five-year-olds tell stories that I assume that the Axe Cop audience would buy up the entire first printing.

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"Nerdcore is like playing Halo while getting a blow-job from Hello Kitty."
-- some guy interviewed in Nerdcore Rising
Bdoomed
Pseudopod Tiger
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Mmm. Tiger.


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« Reply #5 on: April 17, 2010, 01:59:06 PM »

My favorite is this one, and the comment makes it better.  It's from 2008.
Quote
Under Bob’s fez was another.

Jeff Marr

I like that one because it feels like it's missing a word, but then it takes a moment to figure out what it would be, and then once you've figured it out you realize that adding it would make the sentence even worse. I don't know why that kind of conundrum amuses me, but it does.
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I'd like to hear my options, so I could weigh them, what do you say?
Five pounds?  Six pounds? Seven pounds?
Musings and Ramblings
Alasdair5000
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« Reply #6 on: April 17, 2010, 02:55:16 PM »

"Tuesday. Africa. Lion o’clock. "

I must say, I think the right writer could make a hell of a story from that Tongue



(Jesus christ its Lion o'clock, get in the car!)

I actually hear Simon Pegg saying this in his action voice from Hot Fuzz:)  'LION'O'CLOCK.'
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Planish
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Fun will now commence.


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« Reply #7 on: May 04, 2010, 10:38:27 PM »

My favourite finalist in the Noir genre (many years ago) has something along the lines of "... as his eyes slid slowly down the front of her dress."

Eeuw.
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I feed The Pod.
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gateaux
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« Reply #8 on: July 01, 2010, 11:18:44 PM »

ahahahaha that made my night!
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Faraway Ray
Lochage
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Posts: 340


"I loved it!" "So? You also loved World War II!"


« Reply #9 on: July 20, 2010, 11:46:41 AM »

Gotta agree that the "lion o'clock" line was bloody awesome.  Smiley
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A story of lust, violence and jelly.

Well, Here I Am. My little slice of the blaggin' world.
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