Author Topic: EP Flash: Standards  (Read 5598 times)

Russell Nash

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on: December 30, 2008, 01:06:42 PM
EP Flash: Standards

By Richard K. Lyon
Read by Frank Key (of Hooting Yard).

After careful examination of your manuscript no 113785, Corbamite, An Insulator Against Gravity, the editors of Review of Physics have concluded that it is not suitable for publication in this journal. This decision is final and further correspondence on this subject will serve no useful purpose.

Since the above may seem somewhat harsh, let me say what I can to mitigate it. The editors do appreciate that you are working under difficult circumstances: when the senior author of a paper is deceased, it is always hard for the junior author to complete the work in an appropriate manner. Also let us assure you that we do believe you. You have told us that with his dying breath Professor Steinhardt handed you his notebook and said, “Have this published in Review of Physics.” Such an action would be completely in character for Steinhardt since he was a true scientist.

As for your claim that Professor Steinhardt made this statement as he was expiring from disintegrator rays wounds suffered during your escape from the City of Disembodied Brains on Altair IV, our believing that is a somewhat different matter but we need to go into that

Rated G. Contains proven impossibilities.

Statement from Rachel Swirsky:
Richard K. Lyon died on November 21. When I contacted him last month to ask if he still wanted this piece to run on our podcast, he said that the doctors didn’t give him long, but that he hoped this would give the world “one last laugh.”

Escape Artists dedicates this production to his memory. We wish the best to him, and to his family.

Listen to this EP Flash!
« Last Edit: September 15, 2009, 09:42:21 PM by Russell Nash »


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Reply #1 on: December 30, 2008, 03:56:53 PM
An amusing little story.

"Farts are a hug you can smell." -Wil Wheaton

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Reply #2 on: December 31, 2008, 01:17:25 AM
I rewound it back to the second to last line after it finished, just to hear that again.  Loved it.


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Reply #3 on: December 31, 2008, 03:14:35 AM
That was pretty funny. All the way through. Though, of course, the last bit was the funniest.


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Reply #4 on: December 31, 2008, 06:34:41 PM
Great flash piece.  Best wishes to the family and freinds of Mr. Lyon.


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Reply #5 on: January 01, 2009, 12:26:39 AM
Great flash piece indeed. As an academic, who has had his share of dealings with journal editors, I found this especially amusing.


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Reply #6 on: January 02, 2009, 08:43:22 PM
Quite a fun little tale indeed.

I guess I should cancel my vacation plans to the City of Disembodied Brains though, my anti-Disintigration Ray protective suit is on the fritz.


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Reply #7 on: January 03, 2009, 09:29:05 PM
It sounds like every "Dear John" letter I have ever gotten. It's over... We tried... I'm seeing someone else... But your a great guy.


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Reply #8 on: January 06, 2009, 12:39:04 AM
A nice effort but this road was a little too well-worn. I thought the "twist" at the end was, quite honestly, silly. But to my ears, the reader's accent was perfect for the material.


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Reply #9 on: January 12, 2009, 04:29:27 AM
That was fun; not much else to say about it. 

Edit -- Thought of something else to say about it: the reader was perfect.
« Last Edit: January 12, 2009, 07:13:25 AM by Windup »

"My whole job is in the space between 'should be' and 'is.' It's a big space."


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Reply #10 on: February 05, 2010, 06:01:07 PM
A fun story and sorry to hear that the author passed away!


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Reply #11 on: December 23, 2019, 03:30:48 AM
I can't believe I've never commented on how much I like this story. I re-listen to it periodically and thoroughly enjoy it every single time. So fun and kind of accurate... ;)