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Author Topic: PC047 Giant Episode: Bright Waters  (Read 16575 times)

JohnBrown

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Reply #25 on: May 07, 2009, 02:46:58 AM
But we loves gushings, Precious.



Wilson Fowlie

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Reply #26 on: May 07, 2009, 04:56:45 AM
Jan calls him "King" because it's a higher and more recent title. The usage would be the same if Colin Powell were to become president. Very few would refer to him after that as "General Powell." Of course, there are times when "General Powell" would be appropriate. No, he wasn't ever Jan's king, but he was king over the English. And that was enough. :)

Ha! I nailed it.  :)

(One might quibble that it feels like trying to have it both ways: friction with the English to the point that Jan can't call New York by that name, yet refers to their common sovereign by his English title of King rather than the title he held in Jan's native land.  On the other hand, it would just be a quibble. Plus, since when are people all that logical?)

As for the ending. Know that the original manuscript ran for one more page than what you have here. I've posted below. It does make the resolution more clear. However, the editor for the first publication thought it was redundant. I think it's a matter of taste. I go back and forth between the two myself.

I completely disagree with that editor.  There's a big difference between 'redundant' and 'explicit'.  If nothing else, it brings back the green dress, the non-reappearance ??? of which always bothered me.   I felt it had to have some purpose and here I find it does (or did).

I also really like that last reference to the corn stick, which again brings the reader's mind back to the beginning (and hints at the almost-confrontation with O'Day).

Of course, it may well have been those things that he felt were redundant.

As you say, a matter of taste.  I can see the editor's point, to a degree, but if I'd been in that editor's place (assuming I felt that way about the ending, which I don't), I wouldn't have had you just cut the ending; I'd have encouraged you to rework it a bit, possibly tweaking other parts of the story, as the excised part really does hearken back to the opening (and possibly, if one were to look deeper,  to other points in the tale).  Its absence leaves those connections hanging, like strands of a ripped spider web, though I only dimly sensed that before now.


"People commonly use the word 'procrastination' to describe what they do on the Internet. It seems to me too mild to describe what's happening as merely not-doing-work. We don't call it procrastination when someone gets drunk instead of working." - Paul Graham


JohnBrown

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Reply #27 on: May 07, 2009, 02:12:55 PM
I agree, the return to the green dress and corn stick makes it feel whole to me as well. Perhaps some time in the future there will be a collection of JB shorts. Who knows, maybe then that lost little page will finally get its day in the sun.



Chuk

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Reply #28 on: May 07, 2009, 04:22:17 PM
Yes, original ending is definitely better.

--
chuk


Zathras

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Reply #29 on: May 07, 2009, 04:36:31 PM
But we loves gushings, Precious.

And a sense of frivolity!

I would read more stories in this setting.  Please let us know if you write more in this world!



JohnBrown

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Reply #30 on: May 07, 2009, 10:22:01 PM
Zorag, will do. :)

In the meantime, I do have another fantasy with a different but strong historical setting. It was on the Locus recommended reading list for 2008 and will be included in this summer's Year's Best Fantasy 9.

You can read it here

Perhaps it will hit the spot as well.



Rachel Swirsky

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Reply #31 on: May 08, 2009, 02:00:54 AM
The story of John's is a good one. I didn't end up taking it for PodCastle, but interested readers should definitely take a look.



Zathras

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Reply #32 on: May 08, 2009, 03:45:46 AM
Zorag, will do. :)

In the meantime, I do have another fantasy with a different but strong historical setting. It was on the Locus recommended reading list for 2008 and will be included in this summer's Year's Best Fantasy 9.

You can read it here

Perhaps it will hit the spot as well.

I'm going to wait and pick up a copy of Year's Best Fantasy 9.   ;D



GreatAuntMaude

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Reply #33 on: December 14, 2009, 09:51:14 PM
I liked this story very, very much.  I was puzzled at how a nice piece of historical fiction wandered into a fantasy podcast, but after awhile, I quit wondering and just enjoyed it.  I may keep this one.   :)

GAM



Unblinking

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Reply #34 on: December 14, 2009, 10:40:44 PM
I didn't really get into this one.  I don't think it was any fault in the story itself, but I am just not that interested in historical fiction, and after 15 minutes there was no indication that it was anything but that.  I'm also rarely a fan of very long stories, another matter of personal tastes.



yicheng

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Reply #35 on: January 03, 2011, 06:56:43 PM
Just wanted to say that this was one of my Podcastle favorites.  I've been on a native american history run lately, watching PBS shows and the History Channel.  There's so much that gets missed by all those history textbooks.  For many of us in the U.S., "American History" starts at the signing of the Declaration of Independence, and most of what happens before and around that time is presented in the form of a national creation myth (e.g. Mayflower Pilgrims, Paul Revere's Midnight Ride, etc).  It's very cool that this story brings to life the "behind the scenes" characters and stories.