Pseudopod 165: The Copse

[Bdoomed]

Pseudopod 165: The Copse


By Robert Mammone
Read by Ian Stuart

A woman carrying a tray of drinks emerged from the kitchen. She was tall and spare and the loose clothing she wore only accentuated the impression. Sarah noted with alarm the condition of her hands, all knobbed joints and cracked skin. Setting the tray down, the woman looked at each of them, her head bobbing birdlike on a thin neck.

“This is my wife, Margaret,” Standish vaguely waved a hand in her direction. Sarah thought her eyes distant. Sarah extended a hand and Margaret responded. The woman’s hand was rough, like bark. The grip was limp, and Sarah was glad to let it drop. Margaret’s lips parted in a blank smile, revealing a set of large, blunt teeth stained a remarkable shade of brown.

“Would you like a drink?” she said, her voice barely above a whisper.



Listen to this week's Pseudopod.

[MacArthurBug]

I'm still trying to make up my mind on this one. It twisted and turned a LOT before reaching it's point. It gave me the creeps (always important). I hard a hard time getting invested in the two main players, and the "bad guy" was slimy and hateful, not so terribly fearful. The power that could have been put into the copse was almost arm prickling, however it felt like the story didn't quite get there. Eh. Regardless. I got the heebie jeebies and a reluctance to drink cider for the week. Good enough!

[Scattercat]

It had lots of atmosphere, but not a lot of oomph.  The frightening imagery seemed a little too scattershot to be effective; we had creepy little girls, odd shadow-puppets, eerie wardrobes, a run-down rental house in the countryside, a mysteriously addicting drink, an ambiguous prayer to a self-consciously malevolent god-being, an enslaved/subservient wife who warns of impending doom, mystery meat that causes inexplicable bouts of nausea, a lecherous landlord, and, from what I gather, living trees that drink blood.  Just a whole potpourri of "things that are unsettling."  I felt like there were three or four different supernatural events going on rather than seeing them coalesce into one unified whole. 

As far as the story structure, it may have been just distraction that made me miss it, but I was particularly bothered by the vagueness of their errand at the Standish's house.  They were there to butter him up somehow about something, apparently to keep their house that they didn't much want in the first place?  The whole situation felt a bit forced. 

I felt indefinably creeped out while listening, but on review I don't see a coherent structure, and that makes me feel a little tricked and betrayed, like it was just the right sort of words to make things seem frightening without actually having something there to be frightened of.  It's akin to the generically uplifting speeches you get from business leaders at meetings or coaches at pep rallies; you come out feeling all pumped up and inspired, but nothing meaningful was actually communicated.

I give it a "Meh plus."  I didn't actively dislike it, but I probably wouldn't listen to it again if it came up on my iPod.

[kibitzer]

Excellent reading, as always.

Yeah, this was an odd one. There was plenty of atmosphere and creep, although I did get a bit lost in the wardrobe -- were they in a cupboard or a different room?

But... it felt like the parts were greater than the whole.

[Scattercat]

But... it felt like the parts were greater than the whole.

See, that's what I took like two hundred words to try and say.  Sigh.  Back to the drawing board.  (Writing board?)

[stePH]

Listened to this one in bed last night directly after EP221 "Little Ambushes".  I think I might have dozed -- I pretty much remember what it was about and what happened in general ... I just didn't really "get" it.  I think I have to listen again.

And it's interesting that both stories had a main character named Sarah 

[Unblinking]

I pretty much agree with Scattercat here.  Lots of great atmosphere but the many disparate elements never really coalesced for me.  I ended the story thinking I'd missed something.  Or a lot of somethings actually.

Mr. Stuart has got to be one of my favorite readers, though.

[deflective]

i quite liked the atmosphere building; creating a sense of unease when nothing unusual is happening requires a deft touch.  if it's handled badly it quickly becomes annoying (when everything is coloured blood red and all doors yawn with concealing darkness) but it was successful here.


and it's odd to realize that you're more likely to find functional family characters in horror short stories than the other genres.  of course the author usually has horrible, horrible things can happen to them but you never really see them at all in other genre short stories.

[stePH]

Listened again last night; I think I got all there is to get although I still dozed a couple of times.

I think I'm going to keep this one on the iPod permanently.  Mr. Stuart's voice, recorded very well, reading this extremely dull story, is apparently just the thing to put me in a drowsy way.  I slept like the dead last night; my wife didn't even wake me when her alarm went off at 3:00 this morning.

[Bdoomed]

hmm, just listened.  I liked this one, it was very movie-like.  The scene with the trees ripping Roger apart? Crazy!

[Kanasta]

Narrator was, as ever, excellent.
The story was ok, I also felt it lacked coherence and got a bit confused by the wardrobe...
It had a very retro feel to it. I could imagine it being a black and white Hammer horror short, or a story from one of the many horror anthologies from the 70's/early 80's that I used to devour as a kid...

[MacArthurBug]

hmm, just listened.  I liked this one, it was very movie-like.  The scene with the trees ripping Roger apart? Crazy!

I find this interesting. It was the "movie like" quality about this one that bugged me. I had issues not falling into the story.

[DKT]

Nothing like a nice cider, I always say.

[lowky]

Nothing like a nice cider, I always say.

have you tried Ace hard pear cider?  That was my cider of choice when i was in Flagstaff.  Now I'm in China and there is no cider 

[DKT]

Nothing like a nice cider, I always say.

have you tried Ace hard pear cider?  That was my cider of choice when i was in Flagstaff.  Now I'm in China and there is no cider 

I haven't, but will be on the lookout for it now  Thanks!

(Bummer about China, BTW...)

[lowky]

Nothing like a nice cider, I always say.

have you tried Ace hard pear cider?  That was my cider of choice when i was in Flagstaff.  Now I'm in China and there is no cider 

I haven't, but will be on the lookout for it now  Thanks!

(Bummer about China, BTW...)

last post about cider, will take it to PM for anything further so as not to derail story thread.  I think Ace is out of California, so it may not be available east of a certain point or something like that.  It was also on tap where i got it so not sure if they sell bottles.  It does go well with guiness in a half half ratio 

[Bdoomed]

(Bummer about China, BTW...)

seems to be the pervading opinion about China these days.

[Unblinking]

have you tried Ace hard pear cider?  That was my cider of choice when i was in Flagstaff.  Now I'm in China and there is no cider 

My favorite foods when I visited China:
1.  boiled pumpkin
2.  Tomatoes (they were actually sweet instead of bitter and nasty like the ones I find here).
3.  spicy fish soup.  The variety I particularly liked had some seeds in it that I've found here in Asian grocery stores labelled as "prickly ash".  It didn't set your mouth on fire like certain spices, but your face went numb after a couple swallows.
4.  Peking Duck.

But I didn't really like the fact that the food still looked like the animals it came from.  Shrimp with heads and legs still attached, fish with eyes still in (which some of the people in my group ate, ew!).  Chicken feet.  Duck meat, which was super tasty but served with the roasted head on the plate with it, so the eyes stare at you accusingly.

[lowky]

have you tried Ace hard pear cider?  That was my cider of choice when i was in Flagstaff.  Now I'm in China and there is no cider 

My favorite foods when I visited China:
1.  boiled pumpkin
2.  Tomatoes (they were actually sweet instead of bitter and nasty like the ones I find here).
3.  spicy fish soup.  The variety I particularly liked had some seeds in it that I've found here in Asian grocery stores labelled as "prickly ash".  It didn't set your mouth on fire like certain spices, but your face went numb after a couple swallows.
4.  Peking Duck.

But I didn't really like the fact that the food still looked like the animals it came from.  Shrimp with heads and legs still attached, fish with eyes still in (which some of the people in my group ate, ew!).  Chicken feet.  Duck meat, which was super tasty but served with the roasted head on the plate with it, so the eyes stare at you accusingly.

1. the pumpkin here is a little different than us pumpkin, but is quite delicious
2. Tomatoes, I have had all kinds here some sweet, some bitter
3. I tend to avoid most fish here, I just don't like dealing with all of the bones.  So I insert Baozi for your tasting pleasure.  The ones I usually ate had almost a sausage in side, Ground pork with seasonings.
4. and since i am in Hubei province, I have to go with Wuhan Black Duck.  Very spicy, very delicious.  Foods here tend towards the neighboring provinces of Sizchuan and Hunan.  Spicy with a side of spicy.  quite delicious in my opinion. 

I do have to agree with the accusatory food here.  The Chinese love to eat those parts of the animal we usually throw away.  BBQ gristle, Pig ears, Fish Heads especially the eyes, Feet be they chicken, duck, goose, pig.  I have seen dogs hanging for sale by meat sellers.  AFAIK I have not eaten dog.  I love to buy bbq mutton from the Muslim street vendors here.  I figure it's safer than any other bbq sellers, As the muslims wont go near dog or pork.  I figure I won't get some mystery meat. 

[Robert Mammone]

Hello all, I'm Robert, the writer of The Copse.  Thought I'd give it a week or so before replying to the comments made.

First off, many, many thanks to the team at Pseudopod for taking on the story.  It was a real thrill to learn it had been accepted and I've been looking forward to the day of its release for a long while.  Special thanks to Ian Stuart, who has really brought the story and the characters to life, imbuing them with real depth and meaning.

There's a common thread running through the comments, which is while there's loads of atmosphere, there isn't much in the way of plot, or if there is any plot, it doesn't make sense.

I wanted to write a story that was full of mood and atmosphere, designed to send a chill down the spine.  While I wouldn't dare compare myself to him, I was trying for a Ramsey Campbell vibe - full of ambiguity and a rising sense of menace/dread.

A couple of comments have related to a lack of coherence - I had hoped that I gave just enough information for the listener/reader so they could understand what was going on, without laying it all out on a trowel.   

Clearly, that's something that I need to work on.   Still, happy to read any and all comments.  Thanks!

[Unblinking]

Hello all, I'm Robert, the writer of The Copse.  Thought I'd give it a week or so before replying to the comments made.

First off, many, many thanks to the team at Pseudopod for taking on the story.  It was a real thrill to learn it had been accepted and I've been looking forward to the day of its release for a long while.  Special thanks to Ian Stuart, who has really brought the story and the characters to life, imbuing them with real depth and meaning.

There's a common thread running through the comments, which is while there's loads of atmosphere, there isn't much in the way of plot, or if there is any plot, it doesn't make sense.

I wanted to write a story that was full of mood and atmosphere, designed to send a chill down the spine.  While I wouldn't dare compare myself to him, I was trying for a Ramsey Campbell vibe - full of ambiguity and a rising sense of menace/dread.

A couple of comments have related to a lack of coherence - I had hoped that I gave just enough information for the listener/reader so they could understand what was going on, without laying it all out on a trowel.   

Clearly, that's something that I need to work on.   Still, happy to read any and all comments.  Thanks!

It's always a treat when the author drops in on the comment thread for his story.  Thanks for stopping in and saying a few words. 

[Scattercat]

I'm a little amused at the admission that this was a "pure atmosphere" piece.  It certainly did atmosphere well. 

[Bdoomed]

I wanted to write a story that was full of mood and atmosphere, designed to send a chill down the spine.  While I wouldn't dare compare myself to him, I was trying for a Ramsey Campbell vibe - full of ambiguity and a rising sense of menace/dread.

And you were very successful at that!  Like I said earlier, it was movielike at parts.  I love when a description evokes such a strong image to seem like a movie!

[kibitzer]

Hello all, I'm Robert, the writer of The Copse.  Thought I'd give it a week or so before replying to the comments made.

Mate, gutsy move to drop by and comment on the comments -- major props to you!

[Robert Mammone]

Hello all, I'm Robert, the writer of The Copse.  Thought I'd give it a week or so before replying to the comments made.

Mate, gutsy move to drop by and comment on the comments -- major props to you!

Really?  I would've thought more writers would be keen to come and share their thoughts with their audience.  Pseudopod is a fantastic place to have your work heard by a huge audience.  I've been fortunate to have had a few pieces published on the internet this year, but the feedback and audience compared to Pseudopod is miniscule.

I'd've liked my story to have had a better reception (though there have been some nice comments, which I do appreciate) - (I also appreciate the constructive criticism also, don't get me wrong!), but sometimes different things appeal to different people.

[Robert Mammone]

Hello all, I'm Robert, the writer of The Copse.  Thought I'd give it a week or so before replying to the comments made.

Mate, gutsy move to drop by and comment on the comments -- major props to you!

Ooh, a fellow Melburnian.  Hello!

[Swamp]

I'd've liked my story to have had a better reception (though there have been some nice comments, which I do appreciate) - (I also appreciate the constructive criticism also, don't get me wrong!), but sometimes different things appeal to different people.

Well then, I guess I need to voice my enjoyment of the story.  I loved the atmosphere as well as the content.  Mr. Standish was an unnerving figure.  My only confusion was who the intened victum was.  I guess all three of them. 

From the time Julie started up the stairs, I wanted someone to go get her...no, don't listen to him, go get her now...didn't you here what the woman said...get out...I don't care about you, but Julie... It was very good indeed. 

The POV changes in such a story may have been what threw some off.  Keeping the focus on the mother may have kept it more coherant.

[Robert Mammone]

I'd've liked my story to have had a better reception (though there have been some nice comments, which I do appreciate) - (I also appreciate the constructive criticism also, don't get me wrong!), but sometimes different things appeal to different people.

Well then, I guess I need to voice my enjoyment of the story.  I loved the atmosphere as well as the content.  Mr. Standish was an unnerving figure.  My only confusion was who the intened victum was.  I guess all three of them. 

From the time Julie started up the stairs, I wanted someone to go get her...no, don't listen to him, go get her now...didn't you here what the woman said...get out...I don't care about you, but Julie... It was very good indeed. 

The POV changes in such a story may have been what threw some off.  Keeping the focus on the mother may have kept it more coherant.

Yeah, I think that may be the main failing with it - the POV does shift a bit abruptly.  On paper, you can tell what's just happened, but without the text in front of you, I can understand how the thread can be lost.  A better writer would've worked out a way to make it easy for the audience to follow.  Entirely my fault.

Without going into spoiler territory, in a sense, they entire family is Standish's victim - more directly the father, but the others also.

[Unblinking]

Really?  I would've thought more writers would be keen to come and share their thoughts with their audience.  Pseudopod is a fantastic place to have your work heard by a huge audience.  I've been fortunate to have had a few pieces published on the internet this year, but the feedback and audience compared to Pseudopod is miniscule.

It's not unheard of, but isn't particularly common.  I'm guessing that many don't want to see what may be negative feedback.  Or possibly they do read it but don't have anything to say in response.  I don't know. 

[DKT]

I think a few authors also choose not to participate, because they don't want to influence the conversation.

Thanks for saying hi, Robert! It's always nice to see story authors here

[Robert Mammone]

I'm a little amused at the admission that this was a "pure atmosphere" piece.  It certainly did atmosphere well. 

Thanks for the nice comment.  I've always thought that atmosphere etc in a short story trumped any other consideration (obviously the story has to hang together and be coherent) whereas a novella or novel would need to marry up a different number of requirements (characterisation, pacing etc) entirely.  Perhaps I've got it wrong?

[Unblinking]

Thanks for the nice comment.  I've always thought that atmosphere etc in a short story trumped any other consideration (obviously the story has to hang together and be coherent) whereas a novella or novel would need to marry up a different number of requirements (characterisation, pacing etc) entirely.  Perhaps I've got it wrong?

Wrong for one person is not wrong for another.  Each person values different things in a story. 

[Scattercat]

I'm a little amused at the admission that this was a "pure atmosphere" piece.  It certainly did atmosphere well. 

Thanks for the nice comment.  I've always thought that atmosphere etc in a short story trumped any other consideration (obviously the story has to hang together and be coherent) whereas a novella or novel would need to marry up a different number of requirements (characterisation, pacing etc) entirely.  Perhaps I've got it wrong?

I would agree up to a certain point.  You can get away with pure atmosphere in a short story where you can't in a novel (at least, not without being insanely gifted.)  However, I personally prefer a strong thematic connection and at least one really well-drawn character; nothing but atmosphere is like eating cream puffs: you're filled up, but not with anything of substance.  I like a nice round meal in my stories, even the short ones.

Basically, I think this story obscured too much and threw in too many red herrings.  I am a big proponent of "throw out some details and don't worry about explaining the whole thing," but there's so MUCH going on here that it's hard to draw a coherent thread.  The only things that connect together are the apple trees correlating with the mysterious cider.  The moving shadows?  How do they connect to the trees?  Mr. Standish's lasciviousness that comes out of nowhere at the end?  Again, how does that connect to the man-eating apple trees?  What does he do to get victims when he DOESN'T happen to have an entire family indebted to him and willing to beg for the super-crappy rental home? 

So while I did enjoy the atmosphere and felt creeped out, I didn't feel satisfied afterward.  It was a cream-puff, and a nice one, but without something meaty to get my teeth into and a little fiber and greens to anchor everything, it's not something I'd go back to very often.  I know it sucks to hear that sort of thing, even more than a flat "this was terrible!"  (Damning with faint praise is horrid.)  It is only my opinion, in the end.

[Sgarre1]

What does he do to get victims when he DOESN'T happen to have an entire family indebted to him and willing to beg for the super-crappy rental home?

I would have thought was self-evident: the rental home is rarely rented out for long...

[Scattercat]

What does he do to get victims when he DOESN'T happen to have an entire family indebted to him and willing to beg for the super-crappy rental home?

I would have thought was self-evident: the rental home is rarely rented out for long...

It was more that the house was explicitly described as pretty shabby.  The impression I got was the family was desperate or else they wouldn't have had to stay there.  There aren't THAT many desperate people around, is my point, and a trap baited with an unpleasant house isn't much of a trap.  It was just another incongruous element that jumped out at me. 

[kibitzer]

Ooh, a fellow Melburnian.  Hello!

You're from Melbun? Cool! You an Aussie?

By the way, further to what I said earlier, the atmosphere WAS great, really great. Classically creepy.

[Sgarre1]

There aren't THAT many desperate people around, is my point,

I guess.   Where are you living?

[Robert Mammone]

Ooh, a fellow Melburnian.  Hello!

You're from Melbun? Cool! You an Aussie?

By the way, further to what I said earlier, the atmosphere WAS great, really great. Classically creepy.

You betcha.  Currently slaving away in King Street.  Home soon!

[Robert Mammone]

What does he do to get victims when he DOESN'T happen to have an entire family indebted to him and willing to beg for the super-crappy rental home?

I would have thought was self-evident: the rental home is rarely rented out for long...

It was more that the house was explicitly described as pretty shabby.  The impression I got was the family was desperate or else they wouldn't have had to stay there.  There aren't THAT many desperate people around, is my point, and a trap baited with an unpleasant house isn't much of a trap.  It was just another incongruous element that jumped out at me. 

The place they're renting is in the sticks, so isn't what they expected when they moved from the city.  I suppose I could've made it seem filled with polished chrome fittings and garishly coloured plastic, but that would undercut the tension in the marriage that I thought helped flesh the characters out a little.

Originally, I was going to have Roger a victim of the GFC - I did have him blaming Gordon Brown for losing his job, but thought that that would take the listener right out of the story, and date it pretty quickly given the likely events at the next UK General Election.

I don't know that I actively thought whether Standish was regularly sacrificing people - if he was, vanished families would stand out like a sore thumb, even far from civilisation.  I imagine I thought that once in a generation would suffice for his purposes.

There is a line where he has invited the family over for dinner as a welcome/recompense for accidentally disconnecting the gas - this is his method of getting them to come over  - I suppose a straight invite would've sufficed, but I thought making him seem slightly useless as a handyman only serves to make him more menacing later on?  As for him taking up with Roger's newly widowed wife - again, in the back of my head perhaps Roger has used up his present wife and now wants a new plaything - it isn't about having a male heir as his daughter will suffice for future generations.

[Scattercat]

And those are all perfectly reasonable explanations.  If I were making stuff up to suit the story, I'd probably have guessed along those lines.  It's just that there's a LOT of random things going on, and they don't cohere very well.  It's like watching "Serenity" without seeing the first fourteen episodes of Firefly; there's obviously something happening, but it's going by very quickly and the characters seem to be reacting to things in slightly unexpected ways without a lot of on-screen justification.

However, you have said that you were explicitly going for mood over plot, and as has been noted, you whipped up a very thorough atmosphere to it.  Mission accomplished, I say; it just didn't work for me because I prefer more than just atmosphere.

[yicheng]

No offense to the author, but I was completely bored to death with the story.  The whole story could have been better had it been trimmed down to the last 10 minutes.

[Robert Mammone]

No offense to the author, but I was completely bored to death with the story.  The whole story could have been better had it been trimmed down to the last 10 minutes.

Specifically, what was it that you were bored with?

[eytanz]

I just finished hearing this story - I have to say that I am in agreement with the majority position here, which is the atmosphere is really great but the plot does not really cohere. For me the main problem was Emma - what was her role in the proceedings? Sometimes she seemed to be pretty much in control, at other times she seemed to be as much a victim as everyone else (she was found bleeding and unconcious in the wardrobe, after all). Was she being dominated by Standish, like the wife, or was his successor and accomplice? Or something between the two?

Also, Julie's fate was never clear to me - Roger died, Sarah ended trapped. What happened to their daughter? The last we see of her she was attacked by something dark, then she was cold and nearly lifeless when Sarah found her. Was she dying? Was she also trapped? Something else?

Overall, this struck me a bit like a 1970s horror movie, thick on atmosphere and thin on intelligability. Not a bad thing, by any means, though not my preferrence either.

Also - and this isn't a problem with the story itself - I had started noting that marital tension is really becoming a cliche in this sort of horror story. An argument between spouses in act I more or less guaruntees at least one of them will meet a grisly end at the hands of a third party by act III...

[Scattercat]

Y'know, it strikes me that I wouldn't have had nearly so strong a "meh" reaction if the intro had said something like, "This week's story focuses on atmosphere and inspiring that spooky sensation more than on the events themselves."  Like, if I'd known what the aim was, I'd have gone along with it cheerfully and said, "Yup, that did pretty well at what it wanted to do."

I'm not suggesting this as a new policy or anything, but I think it's interesting how expectations can alter the experience of a thing.

[eytanz]

Y'know, it strikes me that I wouldn't have had nearly so strong a "meh" reaction if the intro had said something like, "This week's story focuses on atmosphere and inspiring that spooky sensation more than on the events themselves."  Like, if I'd known what the aim was, I'd have gone along with it cheerfully and said, "Yup, that did pretty well at what it wanted to do."

I'm not suggesting this as a new policy or anything, but I think it's interesting how expectations can alter the experience of a thing.

The problem with this is judging how much information to give - podcastle discovered this in its early days, when they had intros that set the scene for the stories - and in some cases, explicitly explained the subtext of the stories. This was met with a lot of upset from forum members, including myself, who felt that we were being forced down a specific path of interpretation.

And I think the same holds here. Yes, in this case everyone more or less got what the author intended, though some people liked it more than others. But in theory, a story could be written as an atmosphere piece but some readers could see much more in it. Building up their expectations otherwise would probably deprive them the chance of that.

[Robert Mammone]

In acknowledging the comments of most about atmospherics trumping coherence (personally, I don't see it, but I'm closer to the text than anyone, so that's understandable), do you think that if you were to actually read the story, you would have had a different response? 

Also, given Pseudopod is a listening experience, does it matter if the story wobbles a little as long as what you are listening to evokes a visceral response - like sitting around the campfire swapping ghost stories and looking to the edge of the light and wondering what might be lurking in the dark?  I suppose what I'm asking is what experience of horror are you hoping for?

[kibitzer]

In acknowledging the comments of most about atmospherics trumping coherence (personally, I don't see it, but I'm closer to the text than anyone, so that's understandable), do you think that if you were to actually read the story, you would have had a different response? 

Almost certainly, in my case. When listening to an audio story I am, to some extent, listening to the reader's interpretation. Assuming they've read it through themselves to determine how present characters, words, phrases, it can't help being anything but.

When I read a story from the page, I have a -- was going to say "more intimate connection to the story" but I'm not sure that's true. Anyway, I set my own pace through the text; I can stop if I want to and go back; I can stop and savour a particularly visceral or poignant or flat-out beautiful piece of prose.

I'm certainly saying nothing new here, so I'm not sure I'm answering your question -- perhaps I'm interpreting it too literally?

As to what I want from a Pseudopod experience -- well, that varies. I can try to explain why some of my favourites are, in fact, favourites -- HTH.

6, "What Dead People Are Supposed To Do" -- I loved this because it's an hilarious story. Arguably not horror -- except for the zombies -- it was a hell of a great ride and very well-read. (Even my wife liked this one). Atmosphere: not at all scary.

13, "Redmond's Private Screening" -- a great piece. It drew me in with its tension building to an act of harakiri, graphically described. The story that followed -- essentially ghostly revenge -- was well done with a bloody ending. Atmosphere: more of a tension and "eeew OUCH" piece for me, although the resolution was satisfying.

45, "The Goon Job" -- was a clever piece of writing, describing a world I'd like to hear more of. Atmosphere: graphic but not scary.

(I'm starting to feel like a real pretentious dick here, so I'll stop after the next)

134, "Bait" -- my all-time PP fave so far, this probably qualifies as an atmosphere piece. As several commented, the premise, the twist, was telegraphed early on, but that didn't matter to me. I think the claustrophobic and intensely focused setting (the... thoughts? obsession? of one man) threw the events into sharp relief in such a way that the arguable flaws in the story didn't matter. I must also say that the reading, for me, contributed in NO SMALL PART to the whole -- it was stunning. Atmosphere: creepy. chilling.

So look, I really hope this helps. And please remember, few here have said your story was awful, because it wasn't -- the atmosphere thing worked in spades!! If you have the time maybe listen to "Bait" to see one person's reaction to a great piece of audiopod (is that a word?)

Also... there's a reason I chose this moniker ;-)

[eytanz]

In acknowledging the comments of most about atmospherics trumping coherence (personally, I don't see it, but I'm closer to the text than anyone, so that's understandable), do you think that if you were to actually read the story, you would have had a different response? 

Well, in general, I find horror a lot more enjoyable in audio format that when I read it. That's why I subscribe to pseudopod but generally do not read horror anthologies or print magazines (as opposed to fantasy and SF which I both read and listen to). So, while I may have understood a bit more, I would probably have gotten less out of it overall. But that's just my personal taste.

I should point out that my post above reports my post-listening thoughts - while I was hearing the story I was not feeling confused. I was not feeling too scared or anxious, either, because the family was so obviously doomed from the start I did not invest too much in them emotionally. But I definitely was along for the ride.

Also, given Pseudopod is a listening experience, does it matter if the story wobbles a little as long as what you are listening to evokes a visceral response - like sitting around the campfire swapping ghost stories and looking to the edge of the light and wondering what might be lurking in the dark?  I suppose what I'm asking is what experience of horror are you hoping for?

I think it really depends. I think the stories that are more visceral tend to affect me more while I'm listening to them, but the ones that are stronger narratively tend to stay with me longer. There have been pseduopod stories that have been on my mind for days, if not weeks, after I've heard them; there have been others (like this story) that have evoked a response while I was listening but it ended when the story ended. There's nothing wrong with the latter category, but I guess if I were to rank them I'd rank it lower.

[Unblinking]

In acknowledging the comments of most about atmospherics trumping coherence (personally, I don't see it, but I'm closer to the text than anyone, so that's understandable), do you think that if you were to actually read the story, you would have had a different response? 

Also, given Pseudopod is a listening experience, does it matter if the story wobbles a little as long as what you are listening to evokes a visceral response - like sitting around the campfire swapping ghost stories and looking to the edge of the light and wondering what might be lurking in the dark?  I suppose what I'm asking is what experience of horror are you hoping for?

This was actually a good story to have in audio, as the amazing reader and the atmospheric writing worked well together.  I wasn't confused or lost during the story, but I was expecting some of the seemingly random bits of mystery to coalesce into something at the end, and after the words stopped I started to wonder if I'd simply missed something important, or perhaps several somethings.

[yicheng]

No offense to the author, but I was completely bored to death with the story.  The whole story could have been better had it been trimmed down to the last 10 minutes.

Specifically, what was it that you were bored with?

Nothing seemed to happen for a long stretch of the story.  The reader is treated long lyrical descriptions of the twisting road, the trees, what people are wearing, and how they're hunched over a map, etc., but it has very little to do with what's actually happening in the story.  Once I realized that all that was happening for the last 10 minutes was the characters getting dressed and driving some place dark for a dinner party, it was very very hard to continue to pay attention.  Some of the similes and metaphors also seem to stretch poetical license at bit too far for my taste.  At one point, we are told that the apples on the ground reminded somone of a baby's head.  Those must have been pretty big apples!  In what way did they resemble a baby's head, because other than a general roundness, there's very little about an apple that's actually like a baby's head.  Was it soft and smooth, like how a baby's skin is?  As opposed to hard and crunch like an real apple?  Did it have little wispy hairs?  Was it gnarled and bumpy resembling the features of a baby?  We don't know. It just felt like that simile was thrown in there for atmosphere, when if you really thought about it, it didn't really make a lot of sense (at least to me).  At another point we are told that a car's headlights resemble two drops of mercury, when in reality a car's headlights driving down a road looks nothing like mercury (they called it quicksilver for a reason).

In the end, I felt like there wasn't much of a pay-off in terms of an explanation.  How was the evil guy related to the treees?  What was the girl-shape that the husband saw sprinting outside?  What happened to the little girl Julia?  What exactly are the trees anyway?  Demons?  Space aliens?  Just carnivorous plants?  What's up with the deranged evil wife and evil girl?

[Sgarre1]

I think partly the problem may be that atmospheric, evocative, abstract stories in the Ramsey Campbell / Robert Aickman vibe (which I personally like very much - and which I think you did a good job touching on) tend to have a structure that privileges mood over standard plot.  In a lot of Campbell's short fiction, the plot is relegated to series of events, and it's place in the story structure is usually take by an examination of a single character's internal psychological state reacting to those events.  Campbell is especially good at this - his stories tend not to be about what happens but how and why the reader feels it is happening to the main character.

As I said, this is one of my favorite story types, but I could imagine that:

A. It tends not to adapt too well to audio, as the reader's control over the text tends to be taken greater advantage of when a plot through-line is not driving the narrative (readers can dawdle and consider, something listeners can't do).  This is especially true of someone like Aickman, where a turn of phrase, subtly conveyed, may turn out being the crux of our apprehension of events.

B. It tends to be a story form not as widely popular as the plot driven model, especially nowadays.

I could tell early on in "The Copse" that is was looking to be more evocative than plot-driven, and so I didn't expect there to be a reason or solid explanation given.  And I like that, I don't really want any solid, logical, understandable agent in such a story - the inscrutability is part of the creepiness.  But I would agree with what has been said, there perhaps needed to be a little more tying together of the events into the vague shape of a whole (but not an answer).  Making one of the 3 characters the main focus might have helped, or building a narrative detail that threads between the family members.

“It is strange that people train themselves so carefully to go to waste so prematurely.”
Robert Aickman, “The Unsettled Dust” (1968)

[Robert Mammone]

No offense to the author, but I was completely bored to death with the story.  The whole story could have been better had it been trimmed down to the last 10 minutes.

Specifically, what was it that you were bored with?

Nothing seemed to happen for a long stretch of the story.  The reader is treated long lyrical descriptions of the twisting road, the trees, what people are wearing, and how they're hunched over a map, etc., but it has very little to do with what's actually happening in the story.  Once I realized that all that was happening for the last 10 minutes was the characters getting dressed and driving some place dark for a dinner party, it was very very hard to continue to pay attention.  Some of the similes and metaphors also seem to stretch poetical license at bit too far for my taste.  At one point, we are told that the apples on the ground reminded somone of a baby's head.  Those must have been pretty big apples!  In what way did they resemble a baby's head, because other than a general roundness, there's very little about an apple that's actually like a baby's head.  Was it soft and smooth, like how a baby's skin is?  As opposed to hard and crunch like an real apple?  Did it have little wispy hairs?  Was it gnarled and bumpy resembling the features of a baby?  We don't know. It just felt like that simile was thrown in there for atmosphere, when if you really thought about it, it didn't really make a lot of sense (at least to me).  At another point we are told that a car's headlights resemble two drops of mercury, when in reality a car's headlights driving down a road looks nothing like mercury (they called it quicksilver for a reason).

In the end, I felt like there wasn't much of a pay-off in terms of an explanation.  How was the evil guy related to the treees?  What was the girl-shape that the husband saw sprinting outside?  What happened to the little girl Julia?  What exactly are the trees anyway?  Demons?  Space aliens?  Just carnivorous plants?  What's up with the deranged evil wife and evil girl?

I take your point about apples and baby’s heads.  Now that you point it out, the comparison is particularly inapt.  However, the bit about the mercury you have plain wrong.  From the text, it is:

Outside, moonlight silvered the pastures, slipping along the fence wire like mercury.

Perhaps you got a bit confused while listening.

Actually, if anyone is interested in a copy of the story to read, instead of listening to it, I’m happy to send out as many copies as are requested.  Just send me a PM and I’ll forward it to you.

Also, thinking on it and reading what others have said, the story is a bit of a grab bag of different elements.  The section where they enter the house and walk down the corridor, and Roger’s wife glimpses something fluttering in a cage in a room, is simply there to be unsettling.  Similarly, the use of sock puppets to mimic/control reality was designed to be macabre.  Whether it works or not is a matter for the listener, but I personally thought they were unsettling and really, who is a writer writing for other than himself (much as I love my audience!).

The Copse was originally a much shorter piece.  After some telling feedback, I expanded it. While doing that, I was reading a collection of Ramsay Campbell short fiction (with one story, about the two couples who go out into a ring of stones, where the number of menhirs keep changing) was a particular influence, so the Campbell vibe is a real one.  I was also reading a Richard Morgan book (Woken Furies, from memory) and if you’ve read Morgan before, he really ramps up the atmosphere and evocation to 11. 

I tend to take a while to finish a story, let alone edit it satisfactorily, so if the story wanders, that matches the lengthy time I was able to devote to it.  Also, it wasn’t written from beginning to end.  I had the start basically as is, then I had an image in my head of how the ending should be.  The main effort was then to coherently link start and finish.  All along, after the initial comments, my intent was to be as evocative as I could – the storyline after all isn’t particularly novel, so to give it a bit of ‘oomph’, I worked on creating a rising sense of dread and atmosphere.

I really do appreciate all the comments, good, bad and indifferent.  Thanks.

[Alasdair5000]

Incidentally Robert, just in case this hasn't been communicated fully, I, and I'm not alone in this, have total admiration for your willingness to engage with feedback here.  I know from personal experience it can be tough hearing feedback, positive and negative, and the way you're approaching this is the epitome of classy.  Nicely done:)

[Robert Mammone]

Incidentally Robert, just in case this hasn't been communicated fully, I, and I'm not alone in this, have total admiration for your willingness to engage with feedback here.  I know from personal experience it can be tough hearing feedback, positive and negative, and the way you're approaching this is the epitome of classy.  Nicely done:)

Hello Alasdair.  It's a real pleasure to engage with people in a reasonable discussion about the story, and their expectations when listening to Pseudopod.  Thank you for the opportunity.

[cdugger]

This was my first Pseudopod story, so, in a way, it set the tone for me for the rest of them.

I enjoyed the story. And that is the only reason I read/listen. For fun.

It was very predictable, but that is of little concern for me. In a short story, that is expected. In a novel, not so much. You must understand, though, that I have been reading for fun my whole life. I am not yet old, but am far from young, so I have read a lot of stories.

I especially liked how the young girl was used to provide the trees their victim/sustenance. While children are a blessing, they are often 'protected' by authors, thus leaving out a great horror component. A corrupted child is the best way to scare the bejeebers out of some people.

Of course, I have no children, so they all scare me. But, that's for a different forum...

To Robert, keep it up. It was fun, that's what I like, give me more.

[Loz]

Well, at least I can't take solace in the fact that when I arrived at the end of the story confused as to who was the controlling source of the evil in the story, what exactly they were doing and why, and what they achieved at the end of it, that was what the author intended. 

The unfortunate implication I took from this was that Standish uses his trees to kill the men because it's only men that have the strength to stand up to him, women, due to being women, are weaker and therefore he can dominate them just fine, through a mixture of physical, mental and, presumably not long after the story closes, sexual abuse.

[nevermore_66]

Mate, gutsy move to drop by and comment on the comments -- major props to you!

Really?  I would've thought more writers would be keen to come and share their thoughts with their audience.  Pseudopod is a fantastic place to have your work heard by a huge audience.  I've been fortunate to have had a few pieces published on the internet this year, but the feedback and audience compared to Pseudopod is miniscule.

Interesting.  Back when my story was cast, I noticed that authors didn't seem to reply on the forums and assumed that it was some point of etiquette.  Now I'm sad I didn't participate more.  One of my favorite things about the Escape Artists podcasts is the sense of an active community.

Sounds like your interacting well with the feedback, Robert.

I did indeed enjoy the atmosphere.  And I have soft spot for evil trees.  I didn't have a problem with apples being baby heads...but I've got a diseased imagination and things like apples often turn into things like baby heads...

In regards to the last comment, above, I didn't get the impression, from the story, that women are weaker.  In fact, the wife was the only one who was at all suspicious and the only one who would stand up to and resist (most of the time) Standish.  The husband seemed content to ignore everything, compliment the spread, and paint a target on himself.  The only time he did act out, he was only taking the villain's bait.  Standish could have much more easily controlled the husband...but I suspect he would have taken less pleasure in standing over him and saying, "Now you're mine!"

Standish has a thing for the ladies...he's just old fashioned like that 

[Dave]

This could have been great. The build up of mood and atmosphere and creepiness was excellent, but then it was like the author's friends came over and wanted to play, and they just jotted "and then the trees ate the guy. The end." and turned it in.

I mean, really? That's it? We came all this way for that?

Huh.

[Robert Mammone]

This could have been great. The build up of mood and atmosphere and creepiness was excellent, but then it was like the author's friends came over and wanted to play, and they just jotted "and then the trees ate the guy. The end." and turned it in.

I mean, really? That's it? We came all this way for that?

Huh.

I'm an old fashioned sort of guy when it comes to these sort of things.  Why put the phenomenon down to psychobabble when you can have a really creepy, really eerie group of trees feeding on the blood of drunken innocents who've been made a sacrifice by a mad old farmer who very likely worships them?  Perhaps a better writer would've made more of the set up? 

The resolution to the story was essentially the first thing that came into my head while I was thinking about what next to write - it certainly wasn't a frantic attempt to escape a corner I'd painted myself into.  Similarly with another story I've almost finished - the ending came to me first, and I've constructed a story before it which I think matches the ending. 

Still, it's not nice to leave a reader feeling like they've been gipped - unfortunately, I can't do anything to fix you up for the time spent!  Unless it is money you want, in which case, here, have a drink of this tankard of cider...

[Bdoomed]

I need to get me some man-eating trees for the next time someone pisses me off.

[Unblinking]

Interesting.  Back when my story was cast, I noticed that authors didn't seem to reply on the forums and assumed that it was some point of etiquette.  Now I'm sad I didn't participate more.  One of my favorite things about the Escape Artists podcasts is the sense of an active community.

What story did you write, nevermore?  You could always perform a little threadomancy and bring your story back to the top of the forum--I'm curious what you'd have to say. 

[DKT]

Interesting.  Back when my story was cast, I noticed that authors didn't seem to reply on the forums and assumed that it was some point of etiquette.  Now I'm sad I didn't participate more.  One of my favorite things about the Escape Artists podcasts is the sense of an active community.

Bummer, but it's never too late to jump in on the threadomancy! I'd love to hear your thoughts on your story. I really enjoyed it.

[cdugger]

Unless it is money you want, in which case, here, have a drink of this tankard of cider...

Ya know, I think I'll just keep praising your work. And, never join you for drinks.

Hope you don't mind...

[nevermore_66]

Bummer, but it's never too late to jump in on the threadomancy! I'd love to hear your thoughts on your story. I really enjoyed it.

Thanks.  And thus encouraged, I'll go see if I can find the thread.  I think it was 121: "Blood, Snow, and Sparrows".

[El Sabor Asiático]

I can see why some readers might not care for this story, and in fact it's the kind of story even I normally don't care for, but I liked this one quite a bit. To me, anyway, it's not really about what happens, because it's pretty clear from the beginning that our poor protagonists are doomed -- if this were a movie, I'd be yelling at the screen for that family to get out of the friggin' house! -- but more about anticipating the slow unreeling of their inevitable doom. As others have pointed out, it's about atmosphere, and the kind of horror that is based not in shock or gross-out but gradual, mounting dread. I thought the author pulled this off quite well, here.

I also thought this was the perfect kind of story for Pseudopod. I think it actually "reads" better out loud than it might on the page, I think because so much of it is about creating a certain mood, and with a good reader (like we have here) a story like this can be quite spooky indeed.

[Robert Mammone]

I can see why some readers might not care for this story, and in fact it's the kind of story even I normally don't care for, but I liked this one quite a bit. To me, anyway, it's not really about what happens, because it's pretty clear from the beginning that our poor protagonists are doomed -- if this were a movie, I'd be yelling at the screen for that family to get out of the friggin' house! -- but more about anticipating the slow unreeling of their inevitable doom. As others have pointed out, it's about atmosphere, and the kind of horror that is based not in shock or gross-out but gradual, mounting dread. I thought the author pulled this off quite well, here.

I also thought this was the perfect kind of story for Pseudopod. I think it actually "reads" better out loud than it might on the page, I think because so much of it is about creating a certain mood, and with a good reader (like we have here) a story like this can be quite spooky indeed.

I think you've hit the nail on the head there with the last paragraph.  The quite wonderful reading lends the story a weight and heft that it might lack on the page.  Don't get me wrong, I think it reads well (and for anyone who would like a copy to read, PM me and I'll send you a copy of the story back) but the reading makes the experience much more intimate.

[nathonicus]

I can't fault this story for not keeping us in suspense about the fates of our protagonists; too much emphasis is put on surprise or twist endings these days. To be honest, it's going to be very difficult to write any type of horror story which really takes a well-read modern audience by surprise, because of the sheer volume that has come before.  Rather than try to force some sort of BS twist-ending, this story starts off creepy, introduces characters and a situation, and then follows them to their conclusion, maintaining atmosphere and character along the way. The pleasure is in listening as the darkness grows deeper and doom blossoms.

There were many lovely touches - the cider, the prayer, wall shadows - I am especially fond of the brief splash of illumination provided by the car - some anonymous traveler, completely oblivious to the unfolding horror - throws across the scene in the copse.

I think this is probably my favorite story from Pseudopod. 

That could be because the fear of plants taking root in my body is my only remaining child phobia with any real force behind it.  Well done.

[Robert Mammone]

That really is one of the nicest reviews I've ever had for anything I've written.  Thank you for your kind comments!

[Dave]

This could have been great. The build up of mood and atmosphere and creepiness was excellent, but then it was like the author's friends came over and wanted to play, and they just jotted "and then the trees ate the guy. The end." and turned it in.

I mean, really? That's it? We came all this way for that?

Huh.

I'm an old fashioned sort of guy when it comes to these sort of things.  Why put the phenomenon down to psychobabble when you can have a really creepy, really eerie group of trees feeding on the blood of drunken innocents who've been made a sacrifice by a mad old farmer who very likely worships them?  Perhaps a better writer would've made more of the set up? 

The resolution to the story was essentially the first thing that came into my head while I was thinking about what next to write - it certainly wasn't a frantic attempt to escape a corner I'd painted myself into.  Similarly with another story I've almost finished - the ending came to me first, and I've constructed a story before it which I think matches the ending. 

Still, it's not nice to leave a reader feeling like they've been gipped - unfortunately, I can't do anything to fix you up for the time spent!  Unless it is money you want, in which case, here, have a drink of this tankard of cider...

Hey! A reply from the author is just as good as money, IMNSHO, so consider me repaid. Not that you really owed me anything. I guess I could make clearer that the story wasn't bad- it was really good. The only reason the ending let me down was because the build up was so masterfully crafted. It wasn't even so much the bloodthirsty trees, I guess, so much as that it just wrapped up so suddenly. I wanted MORE of the atmosphere and eloquence I'd been so enjoying sinking into like a comfy couch, knowing that sooner or later I was going to have to realize hey, this isn't leather, is it...

So, in that sense, it's a compliment. Of a sort.

A quick glance at my posting history here (and in comments back before they got shut off) will reveal that I am a huge stickler for endings. Movies, books, stories, whatever the media, endings are critical. If a great story doesn't pay off well, it's worse than a story that's merely mediocre throughout.

Anyway, thanks for the reply. I enjoyed your writing style enough that I'd certainly give another of your stories a shot. One not-quite-perfect-by-my-admittedly-high-standards ending is not enough to sour me on your ouvre. So, I hope you sell EA another one so I get another chance to be pleasantly surprised (and by surprised I mean terrified) by the next one.

D.

[Robert Mammone]

Thanks for the kind comments, Dave, they mean a great deal.  I know what you mean about endings - you get so caught up in the sense of the world being created that it becomes a pleasure to read/listen to, up until the point where it ends and all that sense of enjoyment abruptly finishes.  A better writer would've come up with something that fulfilled the build up far more satisfyingly.

One such writer would be Simon Stranzas, whose story, Fading Light, is the latest release.  Really, his story is top shelf stuff that leaves you thinking for a while after finishing it.

[Millenium_King]

It had lots of atmosphere, but not a lot of oomph.  The frightening imagery seemed a little too scattershot to be effective; we had creepy little girls, odd shadow-puppets, eerie wardrobes, a run-down rental house in the countryside, a mysteriously addicting drink, an ambiguous prayer to a self-consciously malevolent god-being, an enslaved/subservient wife who warns of impending doom, mystery meat that causes inexplicable bouts of nausea, a lecherous landlord, and, from what I gather, living trees that drink blood.  Just a whole potpourri of "things that are unsettling."  I felt like there were three or four different supernatural events going on rather than seeing them coalesce into one unified whole. 

As far as the story structure, it may have been just distraction that made me miss it, but I was particularly bothered by the vagueness of their errand at the Standish's house.  They were there to butter him up somehow about something, apparently to keep their house that they didn't much want in the first place?  The whole situation felt a bit forced. 

I was gonna write a review of this one, but I think Scattercat hit the nail on the head here.  Amazing, I know, but I totally agree with Scattercat on this one.

Excellent narration on Ian's part, however.

I was also a little disappointed with Alasdair's outro in which he was unsettled when his kick-boxing instructor asked him if he'd ever done it before simply because he was "big."  Our host focusses on the prejudice of the instructor, but I think the anecdote simply shows someone uncomfortable in their own skin.  It is good to "analyze" things, as our host says, but one must also analyze oneself.  My gentle rebuttal to our intrepid host Alasdair is: we should all accept those things about ourselves we cannot change.  The instructor was not so much judging, as he was complimenting.  Take pride in your size (or your skinnyness, or nerdiness, or intellect, or loudness - whatever the case may be).  Nod and agree with the taunts of the bullies in life, then laugh at THEM.  THEY're envious.  THEY'RE the weak ones.

[Scattercat]

One can recognize the relative quality and effectiveness of a piece of writing while still having deplorable taste in voice and tone.  ;-)

[Millenium_King]

I don't think I usually disagree with you so much about "voice and tone" as I do in plot, narration and pacing.  For example: I didn't disagree so much with the voice used in "The Engine of Desire" or "Set Down This" so much as I despised the plodding pace and utter lack of plot.  Some people call this sort of thing "negative space," but to each his own I suppose.

[Alasdair5000]

Our host focusses on the prejudice of the instructor, but I think the anecdote simply shows someone uncomfortable in their own skin. 

   Yep.  That's true.

It is good to "analyze" things, as our host says, but one must also analyze oneself.  My gentle rebuttal to our intrepid host Alasdair is: we should all accept those things about ourselves we cannot change. 
   Also true.  Been working on that for 33 and a bit years.  I think it's fair to say it's a work in progress.

The instructor was not so much judging, as he was complimenting.  Take pride in your size (or your skinnyness, or nerdiness, or intellect, or loudness - whatever the case may be).  Nod and agree with the taunts of the bullies in life, then laugh at THEM.  THEY're envious.  THEY'RE the weak ones.

   See, this is where we part ideological company because, my whole life, people have told me variations on either that or the idea that if you stand up to a bully, they back down.  And, in my experience, that just doesn't happen.  Being big didn't do a damn thing when I was being bullied, it just made me a larger target.  Being a nerd didn't do a damn thing for most of my time at school, other than give me something that very other people had.  Being a teacher's kid got me more slack from the staff than I'd otherwise have got which was balanced by the two or three kids who hated my dad, and by extension, me.  It's not a situation you win, ever, it's one you outlast and incorporate into how you view the world, for good or ill.  In my case, that means I lead with my brain more than my size, because that's what I know how to do, that's what works for me, but for other people it'll be different.  Your milage, as they say, may vary.

[Fenrix]

The reading was fantastic. I really can't decide whether I like Ian Stuart or the Word Whore more. I think I will split the baby and just pick them both, one for each gender.

As has been brought up before, the atmosphere is well crafted. I felt the tension from the inevitable doom. I was hoping vainly that one or two of the family could escape. There was some great foreshadowing, as with the line talking about what made the apples great was the fertilizer. Some of the more disparate oddities (like the dinner meat or the hide and seek game) could probably be tied up more concisely with a single line like that one.

This was my first Pseudopod story, so, in a way, it set the tone for me for the rest of them.

I enjoyed the story. And that is the only reason I read/listen. For fun.

It was very predictable, but that is of little concern for me. In a short story, that is expected. In a novel, not so much. You must understand, though, that I have been reading for fun my whole life. I am not yet old, but am far from young, so I have read a lot of stories.

I especially liked how the young girl was used to provide the trees their victim/sustenance. While children are a blessing, they are often 'protected' by authors, thus leaving out a great horror component. A corrupted child is the best way to scare the bejeebers out of some people.

Of course, I have no children, so they all scare me. But, that's for a different forum...

To Robert, keep it up. It was fun, that's what I like, give me more.

I think what cdugger says does a really good job of summing up why I come to Pseudopod. If you're not having fun, you're doing it wrong.

45, "The Goon Job" -- was a clever piece of writing, describing a world I'd like to hear more of.

Merlin's Bane did this, although slightly less satisfyingly.

[Robert Mammone]

A short comment from outside these forums for my story. 

http://daljeanis.blogspot.com/2010/11/why-every-beginning-writer-should-study.html

[Malapropos de Rien]

Well, I just listened to this story yesterday, as I work my way through the older episodes, and I wanted to express my pleasure at such a classic style horror piece.  I must say I'm not familiar with the names of Ramsey Campbell or Robert Aickman, though I may know their work or works influenced by them, but this story feels like what I think of as a sort of "gothic" horror, or something akin to how Poe wrote.

No, it is not subtle.  And I like subtlety, but perhaps not all the time.  Much like the 1980 movie The Changeling, starring George C. Scott, which was also very unambiguous in its creepiness, it quickly disarmed me of the notion that I should expect something else, and that allowed me to enjoy it for what it was.  I see this story as a feast with all the trimmings -- those trimmings being the vivid descriptions, and the many, many touches that made the danger so imminent to Sara, and the suspense resulting from the fact that she does nothing to stop it.  Seemingly a victim of her social inhibitions and manners, more than a paralysing fear, perhaps.  I'm not sure if that's enough to explain her lack of action even after Standish's wife explicitly warns her to get out, though, and perhaps the story would have done better without that bit, so that she may yet doubt whether the danger is real (more Hitchcock-like that way, I think).

No one seems to have mentioned the dialogue, which I thought was well-written and characterised them nicely.

In the end, this story delivered exactly what I felt it promised at the beginning.  I rated this story 4 out of 5 stars, which on my scale means that I enjoyed it such that I would gladly listen to it or read it again.

Robert, I would like to take you up on your offer of the text of this story, and a PM will follow in case you miss this post.

[IrisOsiris]

Hello all! While I know that I'm WAY out of the loop on this one, I liked this story so much that I, a 6 year lurker of the EA forums, felt compelled to create an account, just so I could comment on this story. I absolutely loved this! No idea how, after listening to the pod's episodes on repeat year after year, this story escaped me (insert joke about "escape" artists here) but I'm glad that i finally caught it. I see a lot of people commenting about it being a bit obscure, but I felt that it was a strength rather than a weakness. And the last scene just gave me shivers. Wish I would have made an account years ago so I could have commented when the author may have actually seen it. While I doubt  anyone will see this post, I've been lurking the forum for years, seeing what you awesome folk think of these stories, so maybe someone will! Anyways, loved this one, left a huge impression on me. Will definitely be getting bookmarked as one of my pseudopod faves!

[kibitzer]

Nice to hear from you, IsisOsiris! I think it's fabulous people are still finding the older stories and that they make an impression Thanks for stopping by.

[Unblinking]

While I doubt  anyone will see this post, I've been lurking the forum for years, seeing what you awesome folk think of these stories, so maybe someone will! Anyways, loved this one, left a huge impression on me. Will definitely be getting bookmarked as one of my pseudopod faves!

Post seen!  I love to see old episodes pop up with new feedback, and I'm not alone in that.  Feel free to raise whatever old thread you feel moved to raise, and I hope you stick around to enjoy the discussion. 

[Malapropos de Rien]

Seen here, too, since I posted in this thread before and get notifications when there's activity in it.     It would be interesting to listen to this story again now that I've read some more things like The Castle of Otranto.

[Robert Mammone]

Hello all! While I know that I'm WAY out of the loop on this one, I liked this story so much that I, a 6 year lurker of the EA forums, felt compelled to create an account, just so I could comment on this story. I absolutely loved this! No idea how, after listening to the pod's episodes on repeat year after year, this story escaped me (insert joke about "escape" artists here) but I'm glad that i finally caught it. I see a lot of people commenting about it being a bit obscure, but I felt that it was a strength rather than a weakness. And the last scene just gave me shivers. Wish I would have made an account years ago so I could have commented when the author may have actually seen it. While I doubt  anyone will see this post, I've been lurking the forum for years, seeing what you awesome folk think of these stories, so maybe someone will! Anyways, loved this one, left a huge impression on me. Will definitely be getting bookmarked as one of my pseudopod faves!

It's been many a year since I logged in here and what do I find but another kind post by a listener.  As always, the story only comes alive thanks to the narrator, so once again I tip my hat to Stuart.  Really glad you enjoyed the story.  I'ts been so long since I wrote it I should dig up a copy and look it over.  And listen to the recording once more.  Hope everyone on the forums is well!