I really dug this story. I did feel, however, that some scenes were oddly truncated, mostly in reference to the time lapses after Pobrecito's beating. (Also, Pobrecito as the poor protagonist? Funny name choice!
) I can maybe see the writing as purposefully creating the sensation of the loss of time and the confusion of stumbling around post-beating, but the whole fight itself and afterwards just seemed to be missing something for me. Maybe it was the lack of escalation in Roberto's voice, or the quick nature of the scene itself, but
something was missing for me there.
I do NOT, however, want to make it seem as if I did not enjoy the story. I thought it was absolutely wonderfully crafted. The use of sex and sexual fantasies as the primary source of wealth and power was quite interesting. Pobrecito made a living off of selling sex, he admired those who could have such pleasurable and measured sexual encounters, who could smile and enjoy each other, rather than the forced sex, the anger and pain that he witnessed in his own life. I loved how the richness of the dead Americans was reflected not only in their pictured material wealth, but also in their psychological wealth, as pictured through sex. And I especially enjoyed how that theme was mirrored at the end, when Pobrecito knew he was among the wealthy. It was... somewhat grossly dirty, though artfully written to the point that it wasn't simply crass.
Also, the priests reminded me of the Ephors from The 300.
And the use of religious babble to subdue the masses! UUUUGH. I love that theme as much as I hate the whole idea. It's so... insidious.
A post apocalyptic Mexico, as if the modern real Mexico weren't scary enough.
I have a good friend who goes down to Mexico all the time to visit relatives. He doesn't seem scared of it. I think it all comes down to staying away from shady areas. America is just the same.