Author Topic: when the end comes !  (Read 259870 times)

BlairHippo

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Reply #175 on: May 18, 2007, 02:20:32 PM
Damn! "Tolerance/Intolerance" has us by 7 posts!

Quick!
What kind of survivor would you be, were you in a Zombie movie?

I'd be the proselytizing gay atheist doctor performing abortions on demand before going home to my four husbands, and arguing that that killing the zombies is morally suspect as they are entitled to their brain-devouring worldview.

(Look, do you want to get ahead of Tolerance/Intolerance or not?)



Anarkey

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Reply #176 on: May 18, 2007, 02:46:53 PM
Damn! "Tolerance/Intolerance" has us by 7 posts!

Quick!
What kind of survivor would you be, were you in a Zombie movie?

I play a good Lieutenant: Second in command, able to handle situations, but not interested in running the whole show and loathed to be behind a desk. I'd want to be sweeping buildings and rescuing survivors.

I'm first against the wall...or wait, is that the revolution?  Maybe I'd be the recluse who doesn't realize what's going on, because to her all people are zombies anyway.  I'll be writing thirty page diatribes describing my oppression in intricate detail and sending them (with too much postage, of course) to now defunct media conglomerates.  Also, I eat dandelion salads.

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Thaurismunths

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Reply #177 on: May 18, 2007, 02:54:22 PM
Damn! "Tolerance/Intolerance" has us by 7 posts!

Quick!
What kind of survivor would you be, were you in a Zombie movie?

I'd be the proselytizing gay atheist doctor performing abortions on demand before going home to my four husbands, and arguing that that killing the zombies is morally suspect as they are entitled to their brain-devouring worldview.

(Look, do you want to get ahead of Tolerance/Intolerance or not?)
*shrug* It's worth a try... Oh, yeah? Well, I think that you're wrong. And everything you stand for is WRONG! And your father smells of elderberries! :)
*puts on hip waders and waits for the midden to hit the windmill*

How do you fight a bully that can un-make history?


ClintMemo

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Reply #178 on: May 18, 2007, 03:14:44 PM

*shrug* It's worth a try... Oh, yeah? Well, I think that you're wrong. And everything you stand for is WRONG! And your father smells of elderberries! :)
*puts on hip waders and waits for the midden to hit the windmill*

Obligatory related side comment that also serves to extend thread:
I just saw "Spamalot" two nights ago. It was somewhat different from the movie, but still very funny.  (and, yes, the elderberry line was in the play.)

<singing style=Diva>
What ever happened to my part?
</singing>

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BlairHippo

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Reply #179 on: May 18, 2007, 07:43:07 PM
(Look, do you want to get ahead of Tolerance/Intolerance or not?)
Oh, yeah? Well, I think that you're wrong. And everything you stand for is WRONG! And your father smells of elderberries!

Oh, yeah?  Well, you are a doody-head!  Everything YOU stand for smells of DOODY!  And so does your father!

(Also, some bastard rewired my keyboard so the period is mapped to the exclamation mark!  It's getting annoying!  So !!! if you have any advice on how this might be corrected, I'd be grateful for it!)



slic

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Reply #180 on: May 19, 2007, 04:11:49 AM
Well "Tolerance/Intolerance" is up to page 11 and 22 posts ahead at this point, sorry.

We need to be more inflamatory. Speaking of flames, I'm going to try for a single answer trifecta:

What about zombies as fuel for fire?  A burning zombie soon becomes a dead(?), non-functioning zombie (answer for ClintMemo's weapon's thread), get enough of them together and we would run a steam plant (answer for oddpod's resource thread), and my character would be the nerdy loner virgin, who's secret hobby/passion is flames (an arsonist who abides by the law) and this weird obsession is what saves his town (he's got flamethrowers and can built flamewalls and such) and this makes him a hero - who, of course, tragically dies saving his impetuous sweetheart, whom he has had a crush on since grade school.  Or I'd be a guy like Ash, with a chainsaw hand!  That would be cool - a chainsaw hand and a smart ass answer for everything.

Oh and BlairHippo, ClintMemo, Thaurismunths - you are all of you wrong,  you are more cowardly than English K-nig-its, and my one true God will smite thee with great vengenance and furious anger if you survive this Plague of Zombies (this was #11 if the Egyptians hadn't wised up)



Bdoomed

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Reply #181 on: May 19, 2007, 06:24:10 AM
What about zombies as fuel for fire?
Or attach some brains to a fishing pole out in front of them and use multiple zombies for turning turbines deep underground, supplying electricity to cities worldwide!
tho burning zombies would look cooler... either way it will be incredibly smelly...

I'd like to hear my options, so I could weigh them, what do you say?
Five pounds?  Six pounds? Seven pounds?


oddpod

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Reply #182 on: May 19, 2007, 12:47:43 PM
it carnt be more smelly than non-burning zombis

so we nead somthing contrevershal to get thing hoted up?

what do we think about the living dead as sexual recreashon?

just kick all the teath out slip on a rubber johnny and youre good to go!

you can ether have them cold or stick pipes in the aretes/vains and pump warm wharter thue them.

of corse the ladys looking for love will nead to sort out some kind of scafolding , but on the whole i think its a fine solushon for fokes who have ended up whith undead partners,

it nedent be till death do us part

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Bdoomed

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Reply #183 on: May 19, 2007, 07:11:08 PM
ummm... yea thats worse than blow up dolls.
Ya gotta be REALLY desperate to need that.  It would probably be very uncomfortable too.

I'd like to hear my options, so I could weigh them, what do you say?
Five pounds?  Six pounds? Seven pounds?


slic

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Reply #184 on: May 20, 2007, 11:16:54 PM
Hmmmm -ever since Bdoomed cut down the Tolerance thread, we've been ahead - coincidence that he posted here last???  :P




BlairHippo

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Reply #185 on: May 21, 2007, 06:58:12 AM
Hmmmm -ever since Bdoomed cut down the Tolerance thread, we've been ahead - coincidence that he posted here last???  :P

Hell no.

Sometimes, nothing beats having someone on the inside.  :)



wakela

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Reply #186 on: May 28, 2007, 11:33:42 PM



Bdoomed

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Reply #187 on: May 29, 2007, 12:20:52 AM
Hmmmm -ever since Bdoomed cut down the Tolerance thread, we've been ahead - coincidence that he posted here last???  :P

haha i didnt realize i was part of a conspiracy!
(or did i?)

Oh, My God!
no... noooo.... NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! The end has come (crying shame they didnt destroy all of the macs there...)

(ha but how amazingly, horrifically funny would it be if someone truly believed they were zombies and whipped out a shotgun and a katana and started kickin arse)
« Last Edit: May 29, 2007, 12:35:47 AM by Bdoomed »

I'd like to hear my options, so I could weigh them, what do you say?
Five pounds?  Six pounds? Seven pounds?


ClintMemo

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Reply #188 on: May 30, 2007, 01:50:34 AM
no... noooo.... NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! The end has come (crying shame they didnt destroy all of the macs there...)

(ha but how amazingly, horrifically funny would it be if someone truly believed they were zombies and whipped out a shotgun and a katana and started kickin arse)

"Lady, I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to leave the store."

Life is a multiple choice test. Unfortunately, the answers are not provided.  You have to go and find them before picking the best one.


Thaurismunths

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Reply #189 on: May 31, 2007, 02:42:50 AM
This... This will be my zombie vehicle.
Except I want to have a pair of 48" chainsaws on the end of the arm, instead of the mine sifter.

How do you fight a bully that can un-make history?


Russell Nash

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Reply #190 on: June 11, 2007, 12:13:29 PM
We can't have been out of things to talk about here. We didn't really have our plans figured out yet.

I promised Heradel I'd poke some holes into a few of his ideas.  I'm just about to run out of the house here, so I only have time for one.

The island idea is fun, but sailing on open water is not easy and the distances involved, especially to places like midway, are immense.  A real sailor probably wouldn't have suggested the island idea for anything more than a few hundred miles off.  For newbie sailors it's more like twenty.  Weather, that is absolutely no problem to drive through, will sink most boats, that an untrained sailor could even get moving. 

Also many of the islands suggested, especially Greenland, are unpopulated for a reason.  Staying on them is extrememly difficult even when you come equipped with everything you'll need to set up shelter and to eat.  Greenland has almost no food.  No edible plant life and limited animal food.  It also has no fuel source not even wood. 

More later, gotta go.



Thaurismunths

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Reply #191 on: June 11, 2007, 04:04:19 PM
We can't have been out of things to talk about here. We didn't really have our plans figured out yet.

So, I took a long, hard look on Google Earth today, and I'm so boned.
I'm about 20 minutes outside of Detroit, in the suburbs. That puts me in a high residential zone with few highways, and they're already hard to navigate with normal traffic. Supposing I try to run, my options are Mid-Michigan, or the water.
Going the Island route, there several good locations: small residential islands with in 10 miles of shore. Problem is, they're already occupied and well known. I doubt I'll be the only person to think of making it to them for safety. And as I don't have a watercraft I'd have to steal one and hope I don't sink it/me.
Heading west is probably my better option. Michigan has long flat highways that will fill up quickly with evacuees, but we also have lots of dirt roads and flat fields, and I have a jeep. Odds are I'll be able to make it wherever I need to with enough gas and batteries for my GPS. Weapons aren't much of a problem, I have the basic ideas of how to make and use most English & Celtic weapons. Firearms will be a little more difficult if I have to get them on my own, but if I meet up with some friends they'll be able to help me out.
That still leaves me the question of where to go though. I’ll probably head to a state park for starters. I’ve yet to see a Park Ranger Office that isn’t made from brick, and they all have radio towers, emergency supplies, out houses, and some times even a 4x4 truck.

How do you fight a bully that can un-make history?


wherethewild

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Reply #192 on: June 11, 2007, 04:15:55 PM
I´m not sure if others have seen this and know the full extent of the danger:

http://icanhascheezburger.com/2007/05/29/zombie-cat/

The Great N-sh whispers in my ear, and he's talking about you.


BrandtPileggi

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Reply #193 on: June 11, 2007, 06:09:32 PM
I'm just gonna throw this out there. Take it as you like.

Maggot gun.



eytanz

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Reply #194 on: June 11, 2007, 06:15:04 PM
I'm just gonna throw this out there. Take it as you like.

Maggot gun.

So, a weapon that you fire at a zombie, wait a few weeks, and then he'll fall apart?

I think throwing jars of maple syrup at the zombies would have much the same effect, and also has the advantage of not having to run the risk of a maggot infection every time you reload with an open wound.



Thaurismunths

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Reply #195 on: June 11, 2007, 06:36:34 PM
I'm just gonna throw this out there. Take it as you like.

Maggot gun.

So, a weapon that you fire at a zombie, wait a few weeks, and then he'll fall apart?

I think throwing jars of maple syrup at the zombies would have much the same effect, and also has the advantage of not having to run the risk of a maggot infection every time you reload with an open wound.
You bring up a good point.

However, you won't have to worry about a maggot infection as they only eat dead flesh.
In fact, they're used in surgery to clean up nasty wounds: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maggot_therapy

How do you fight a bully that can un-make history?


eytanz

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Reply #196 on: June 11, 2007, 07:06:06 PM
Quote from: Thaurismunths link=topic=20.msg11538#msg11538
However, you won't have to worry about a maggot infection as they only eat dead flesh.
In fact, they're used in surgery to clean up nasty wounds: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maggot_therapy

Sure, in controlled, otherwise sterile conditions maggot infections are not an issue and have beneficial uses.  But maggots in the wild are disease-carriers, so that while they might not eat too much of the living flesh, they can certainly make things considerably worse.

Anyway, in order to not veer too far off topic, I'll offer my own plan in case of a zombie armageddon: not surviving.

Simply put, I think that what film and literature teaches us is that zombies are never the start of something good. You rarely hear or read people say "well, the zombies were a bit rough, but in hindsight, they really helped raise our standard of living". No, zombies are always followed by martial rule and society becoming an authoritarian dystopia, or else they make society degenerate into chaos where every day is a battle. And when you get used to that, there's another zombie outbreak to make things even worse. Surviving just doesn't seem worth the hassle, really.
« Last Edit: June 11, 2007, 07:32:40 PM by Russell Nash »



BrandtPileggi

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Reply #197 on: June 11, 2007, 07:16:33 PM
I'm just gonna throw this out there. Take it as you like.

Maggot gun.

So, a weapon that you fire at a zombie, wait a few weeks, and then he'll fall apart?

I think throwing jars of maple syrup at the zombies would have much the same effect, and also has the advantage of not having to run the risk of a maggot infection every time you reload with an open wound.

Good point. Although I'm not sure about it taking weeks (I guess it's dependent on whether you have the 2# hopper or the 20#). Alas, it's a moot point. 'Not quick enough' is what I'm hearing. Well this isn't a quick fix to get you out of the tight situation kinda thing. This is an end-to-the-entire-problem type fix.

You're not looking at the big picture. Zombie attacks are alien species' method of helping us save ourselves. Let me spell it out for you.

You see, here's how it works. Maggot guns are dispersed by various forward thinking world governments for the eventuality of zombie attack (let's face it, we all know it's coming).

Step 1. After the initial onslaught, there's still several million people alive. Those people then shoot their Maggot guns at targets non stop for about a week (Of course being able to reload with the supplied "U.S. Maggot Farm" [supply your own excrement]).

Step 2. Zombies sprayed with said maggots begin to decay rapidly.

Step 3. Zombies return home after a long day's brain eating and pass on the maggots to their zombie wife and children. The children then pass on even MORE maggots to the kids at Zombie School and their zombie teachers.

Step 4. Hold up in the Winchester with your best mate and wait for the calvery.

Step 5. After 2 weeks, Repeat previous steps with Government supplied "Bat gun" to deal with the left over pestilent fly population.

Step 6. Bats go fill up caves with Guano. Excess bats die off in said caves.

Step 7. Hippies mysteriously grow most potent Cannabis crops in the history of the world

Step 8. World Peace is declared 4 months later.

See. Undead invasions are for our own good.
« Last Edit: June 12, 2007, 12:59:13 AM by BrandtPileggi »



Bdoomed

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Reply #198 on: June 11, 2007, 07:24:24 PM
Well if you put it that way...

now all we gotta do is figure out how to bring about an undead invasion.  anyone? anyone?

I'd like to hear my options, so I could weigh them, what do you say?
Five pounds?  Six pounds? Seven pounds?


oddpod

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Reply #199 on: June 12, 2007, 10:12:51 AM
thats easy
the work is already half done for us!
day time TV, the ultimat zombifier

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