Author Topic: PC092: Sir Hereward and Mr. Fitz Go to War Again  (Read 15554 times)

Unblinking

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Reply #25 on: March 08, 2010, 05:15:43 PM
Ah. I'd forgotten about that. Very true and thanks for mentioning it.

Again, apologies if that messed up the story for anyone, and I'll try not to mention anything too spoilery in future intros.

It didn't bother me in this particular case.  When I heard the bit about the god-hunting puppet road trip, my first reaction was "What story is that?  And where can I read it?"  And the answers were apparently "This story." and "Now."  :)



mbrennan

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Reply #26 on: March 23, 2010, 08:03:56 AM
Great worldbuilding in this one.  I think, though, that for me to love it, I would have needed it to be either shorter or longer.  I was disappointed that more wasn't done with the woman (whose name I can't recall), and that the stuff about the witches was dropped in so late, with so little exploration; a shorter version could have had a tighter focus, whereas a longer one could have delved into those things in greater detail.  When the god-killing plot showed up, it left me feeling like too much of what came before had been misleading, making me think this was going to be a story about Sir Hereward and Mr. Fitz joining the mercenary forces and dealing with some plot along those lines.

Which is not the same thing as saying it was bad.  I enjoyed it quite a bit.  But it didn't punch as hard as it could have, under different circumstances.



Paranatural

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Reply #27 on: March 23, 2010, 01:31:24 PM
I really enjoyed this story. The plot itself was interesting, as were the characters. I find the idea of an boy sent out with no family except a wooden puppet to fulfill his mothers' duties rather interesting. Has he been cursed by the witches to never find peace and only discover strife, perhaps because of the strife he brought to their organization by being born? There were a few moments of exposition worked in there that I thought were rather awkward, like when Mr. Fitz started explaining why they had to kill the godlet (Anyone else wonder at the difference between a godlet and a God in this story?). Anyway, overall an excellent story and I hope to perhaps hear more of Sir Hereward and Mr. Fitz.



tinroof

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Reply #28 on: March 24, 2010, 05:03:09 PM
I know we already have a thread about how "feels like part of a larger narrative" shouldn't be a criticism, but I really think it was a major flaw in an otherwise very good story. It felt like it was written with the assumption that we already knew certain things about the setting and characters - the parts where Hereward explains he was raised by the witches, for instance, or why Mr. Fitz was able to pass through the barrier, seemed like they were supposed to be Dramatic Reveals™, but without any pre-existing background for them they just fell flat to me. Especially the latter - the fact that Mr. Fitz technically qualifies as a pregnant woman has absolutely no bearing on the rest of the story except as a convenient excuse for not putting in a barrier-breaking scene. In a larger narrative, there probably would have been hints at his nature, and the explanation would have been a very effective "aha!" moment, but as it was it seemed to come out of left field for very little reason.

The witch thing is similar. If we'd known about the history of the setting, and had heard references to the witches as evil, god-killers, etc., then the fact that Hereward was raised by them and that their purpose was good would have been a much more powerful moment. Again, without that background it comes off as somewhat forced exposition instead.

Again, I liked the story, and I think total immersion can be a very effective way to worldbuild if you do it right. But there's a difference between gradually revealing the world by example as you go along, and just pretending everyone already knows what you're talking about. They look the same, but the effect is very different.



That Hirschman Guy

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Reply #29 on: March 26, 2010, 02:09:47 AM
I enjoyed this quite a bit. Great voice characterization. An immersing world which I would love to revisit in subsequent stories, if there are any.



justenjoying

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Reply #30 on: January 15, 2012, 11:42:16 PM
I read the other podcastle Hereward and Mr. Fitz story before this one and i was excited by the other one and
thought this one was bland. While my boyfriend read them in release order and had the opposite reaction. The premise of the
characters are awsome enough to carry the whole story and even make it an enjoyable adventure, but once the novelty of the
world stiching needles wears off, it is exciting fluff much like a action movie. Not to say they arn't fun, just not much else.
« Last Edit: January 21, 2012, 11:56:31 AM by justenjoying »