I have to admit that I didn't like this one at all. I, too, found the Persehpone myth references extremely heavy-handed, which lead to a few groans and moans of my own.
What bugged me the most, however, was HD. I didn't like the sense of his being pulled ass-backwards into getting what he wants. In my mind, characters are interesting when they boldly (or reluctantly, or fearfully, or whatever) take chances and make sacrifices to get what they want and then suffer or enjoy (or both) the consequences. HD is an incredibly passive character. He doesn't end up in this situation because of something he does or doesn't do, an act he succeeds or fails at. He stumbles into it.
Portia is also passive. Demetria is passive. Nobody actually acts in this story except for the crazy Italian major-domo, they just react. The result? A story with very little fire to it, and one I didn't enjoy.
The final two points are very personal. Firstly, I don't have a lot of connection to stories that make the (in my experience, flawed) assumption that the only way things get done is by uncharacteristically selfless corporate assholes (not that all assholes are corporate or all corporates are assholes - but HD is the very image of the corporate asshole archetype). People who set out to do good - and do good purely, without getting vengeance in their humanitarianism (two great tastes that DON'T taste great together) or hiding it behind a businesslike veneer of selfishness - like Portia, fail. To me, this is not a true reflection of reality and not an interesting narrative conceit.
Secondly, I didn't enjoy HD because he was a god-damned rapist and the story never dealt with it.
The first few times I'll forgive; HD didn't know what was happening. But later on, when it says he rose from his bed, where he'd been lying with her, as he did every night... Dude, she doesn't want you, not really, and you know it. This is creepy and wrong.
That said, I'd be entirely ok with a story
about that situation. A story about someone trying to say no to a twisted version of something he's wanted for years... But something that heavy has got to be the subject of the story, not an afterthought. I can take the bitter with the sweet, but only as part of the meal. Dropping it in at the end of the story only leaves me with a bad taste in my mouth.
See what I did there
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