PC348: Testimony of Samuel Frobisher Regarding Events on Her Majesty’s Ship

[Talia]

PodCastle 348: Testimony of Samuel Frobisher Regarding Events on Her Majesty’s Ship CONFIDENCE, 14-22 June, 1818, With Diagrams

by Ian Tregillis

Read by Ian Stuart

Originally published in The Magazine of Fantasy and Science Fiction, July/August 2014.

I joined His Majesty’s Royal Navy in 1808, and a man more grateful for the press-gangs you’ll never meet. To answer your question, Sirs, I spent four years in the service of
Captain Nares ere I beheld the tentacled Bride.

A brave and virtuous soul was the captain, never given to rage nor drink during my years with him.  And upon my oath, never once did he take the lash to a sailor’s back without just cause before she arrived. But he changed the moment that accursed creature slithered upon the deck.

Begging your pardon, Sirs?  I lost much of my hearing on the
last voyage of the Confidence.

Aye.  I get ahead of myself.  I’ll start at the beginning.

Rated R. Contains Violence (without diagrams)


Listen to this week’s PodCastle!

[Unblinking]

This was soooo good.  I loved it from start to finish.  Ian Stuart's voice is made for horror narration, and seems especially suitable for this kind of nautical horror for some reason. 

Freaky monster with its very effective charm both horrible and at times kind of funny.  I would love if a talented illustrator like Julie Dillon or Dan Dos Santos would make the illustrations referred to in the testimony.  In particular, the one I would LOVE to see is the one he described where the captain is strolling on the deck with the tentacled bride and the monster is holding a parasol that the crew has made from materials onboard, the captain proud of his prize woman and most of the crew jealous of her attentions.  If that were illustrated it might be my favorite illustration of all time.

And this is eligible for Hugo this season--I've heard a lot of good contenders, but I'll have to at least consider this.

[Varda]

Yeah, I think Cthulhu parading around with a parasol is my new favorite thing of all time. This story was full of SO much win! Every time he mentioned the diagrams, I cracked up (it was funny, even while being horrific, like a guy who saw Bigfoot and now REALLY wants you to look at his blurry pictures). It put me in a real nautical mood, so I had to re-watch "Master and Commander" this weekend. And Dave's outtro was full of all kinds of win--allllll the nautical PC episodes! I need to make a playlist, goddamn the Dolphin!

Also, I hope someone can find Dave's ghost pirate story, because I want to know what happens after the broken icy finger.

[NumberFive]

I too enjoyed this one from beginning to end. The narration was perfectly suited to the story. The visuals in my head were so vivid as I was listening that I felt almost as if I was on board the Confidence. Great job.

[TrishEM]

Not quite what you asked for, but I just stumbled across a picture of a sea monster holding a parasol whilst strolling with a companion! Enjoy!
https://twitter.com/saladinahmed/status/565725603954163713

Freaky monster with its very effective charm both horrible and at times kind of funny.  I would love if a talented illustrator like Julie Dillon or Dan Dos Santos would make the illustrations referred to in the testimony.  In particular, the one I would LOVE to see is the one he described where the captain is strolling on the deck with the tentacled bride and the monster is holding a parasol that the crew has made from materials onboard, the captain proud of his prize woman and most of the crew jealous of her attentions.  If that were illustrated it might be my favorite illustration of all time.

[InfiniteMonkey]

1) Excellent, EXCELLENT narration. You WILL have Ian back for more!!!!

2) Sorry Dave, but Two Years Before the Mast was one of those Hated Books I *had* to read in school - might even have been read to us - for California History. Blegh!

[Devoted135]

Great story and narration! It was seriously creepy without going so far that I couldn't listen to it. I was particularly struck by the imagery of the rhythmic knocking that he couldn't identify during his night watch, which turned out to be the scientist hanging amongst the rigging. And that outro! So many awesome nautical stories!

[Fenrix]

This story was very nearly perfect. However, it needs more diagrams. I blame The Dolphin, God Damn it.

[c210344]

This was very good, I must listen to more Podcastle episodes! Must also listen to everything that Ian Stuart narrates, great Yorkshire accent on this one & I think the narration added a lot (because of the context).
This reminded me a lot of William Hope Hodgson and was obviously inspired by his Sargasso Sea stories. More on Hodgson here: https://williamhopehodgson.wordpress.com/

[Fenrix]

This was very good, I must listen to more Podcastle episodes! Must also listen to everything that Ian Stuart narrates, great Yorkshire accent on this one & I think the narration added a lot (because of the context).
This reminded me a lot of William Hope Hodgson and was obviously inspired by his Sargasso Sea stories. More on Hodgson here: https://williamhopehodgson.wordpress.com/

Make sure to check out A Voice in the Night for more nautical Hodgson, and Graveyard of Ships for more nautical Ian Stuart.

[c210344]

Make sure to check out A Voice in the Night for more nautical Hodgson, and Graveyard of Ships for more nautical Ian Stuart.

Great! I enjoyed the "A Voice in the Night" and I must have listened to "Graveyard of Ships" but not since I worked back through the pre-2010 episodes in 2011 or so... 
Will re-listen.

[albionmoonlight]

Let me join the chorus of awesomes for this story.

My only quibble was I wanted the end to be the inquiry board believing his story and setting up a ship of deaf sailors to go fight sea monsters.  I guess there's always time for a sequel.

[Unblinking]

I can't be certain without seeing the sailor's sketches, but I think that the monster in this story might be Taylor Swift, and we've never realized it because we've heard her singing.  "Darling I'm a nightmare dressed as a daydream"--sounds like Cthulhu strolling on a deck with a pretty parasol doesn't it?  She tells us right in her song, and nobody believes her, they think she's just talking about her history of relationships that are forever documented in song, but no she is really the tentacled bride.