EP379: Concussion

[timprov]

I agree with Cutter and Listener, I kept thinking to myself "wow, this is a really cool Science Fiction story, but a really lousy sports story."

That said, this was one of the more enjoyable stories I've listened too in a while.

[Cutter McKay]

I forgot to mention, I LOVED the background sounds in this tale. I noticed it right away because I'm used to these stories all having a silent background. So when it started with the alarms, I actually glanced around my car to see if it was coming from an outside source. Once I realized it was a part of the recording I almost smiled. I think it did wonders for separating the breaks in the story and added volumes to the mood of the piece. Well done, Mat.

[HailToTheChimp]

Like a few people on this board I couldn't fully appreciate this story due to too much suspension of disbelief.

Until, I realised that there was a specific reason that the aliens had aligned their ship to head towards a concussed quarterback;
the only cultural knowledge the frog people had of earth were late night repeats of camp 80's films:

http://youtu.be/UoKV2dudWYk

Flash!

[Cutter McKay]

And speaking of American Football:
Go 49ers!

[Devoted135]

Knowing essentially nothing about football, I was thankfully spared from being bothered by all of the technical issues. I spent most of the story wondering what the connection between the two scenes was, and also feeling very sorry for concussed football players. The conclusion was a little too quick for me to really pick up what was happening; by the time I caught on the outro was already playing. However, for the most part I was just enjoying the ride.

I also thought the reading was excellent, and very much noticed/appreciated the sound effects. Much like EP316: Site Fourteen, I thought the subtle use of sound effects elevated a middling story to a great episode.

[jenfullmoon]

I couldn't figure out the plot of this until I came in here and read this thread. It made more sense once I knew what to look for, but mostly I was as tangled as Tyler.

What an ending, though.

[Swamp]

I wanted to comment on this story specifically to congratulate Mat on the tremendous job he did on the production!  I am so glad that others have commented to say the same thing.  I have also done some production with sound effects, and I know how much work it can be.  This story needed some audio ques to make it understandable and you made it work seemlessly.  Fantastic job, man!

I did like the story.  I did notice some of the football-specific oddities that Listener mentioned, but wasn't too distracted by them.  I just kind of went with the flow.  I am interested to hear more about the alien war with the frog-men.  (or were the featured aliens the frog-men).

[Unblinking]

This had some good things going for it.  I liked the idea that the ship's captain was trying to evacuate the target area, but that only a certain class of neuro-atypical was able to get the message (neuro-atypical in this case caused by blunt force trauma).

I didn't pick up on all the football flubs.  I played in high school, but was never any good at it, and have never watched much of it.  But I found it entirely implausible that the doctor who has checked him over would allow him back on the field.  If the coach doesn't want to let him, then he should've talked to the officials.  That's a man's life on the line there, and that was a major violation of his Hippocratic oaths to keep his mouth shut for the sake of a football game.

I found it implausible that not only is the ship going to hit Earth somehow in the vastness of all space, by accident, but it's going to land in the middle of a once-a-year event with the highest television ratings.  By accident.

[Gamercow]

* It's not very easy to get 22 points in football -- a TD is worth six, but usually seven because the extra point is a gimme. Field goals are worth 3. It is possible to get a two-point conversion after a TD, but given that the other team had 27, I can't see a reason Tyler's team would go for two even if they were mounting a comeback. Unless somehow Tyler's team got a safety early on in the game (which is possible, but not likely, as safeties are rare), 22 is a very strange point total to have.

Here is a very possible scenario for 22 points:  Touchdown(6), XP(7), 3FG(16), Touchdown(22), missed 2 point conversion.  The score before the second touchdown was 24-16.  In that case, the 2 point conversion makes a TON of sense, because if you miss, you're down by 2, if you get an XP, you're down by 1, but if you convert, you're tied.  Same scenario if the score was 27-16.

On the story, I was able to suspend some disbelief about the football flubs, noting that it made a good setup for the ending.  Unfortunately for me, it was seen as just that, a setup for an ending.  It seemed like this story was written backwards from the ending.  That said, it was overall enjoyable and Mat's audio effects helped it MASSIVELY, just like Site Fourteen. 

[Listener]

* It's not very easy to get 22 points in football -- a TD is worth six, but usually seven because the extra point is a gimme. Field goals are worth 3. It is possible to get a two-point conversion after a TD, but given that the other team had 27, I can't see a reason Tyler's team would go for two even if they were mounting a comeback. Unless somehow Tyler's team got a safety early on in the game (which is possible, but not likely, as safeties are rare), 22 is a very strange point total to have.

Here is a very possible scenario for 22 points:  Touchdown(6), XP(7), 3FG(16), Touchdown(22), missed 2 point conversion.  The score before the second touchdown was 24-16.  In that case, the 2 point conversion makes a TON of sense, because if you miss, you're down by 2, if you get an XP, you're down by 1, but if you convert, you're tied.  Same scenario if the score was 27-16.

I concede the point.

[CryptoMe]

Okay, I interpreted the ending in a very different way than everybody else.

To me, the lines
"Tyler made the sign of the old ones again, dabbing the second finger of his left hand to his forehead and making the circle. The priests had killed him too, but Una, at least, would be safe"
meant that Tyler had been taken over by Una, so Tyler's mind (but not his body) was effectively killed, and Una (whose mind now inhabited Tyler's body) would survive. For me, the clincher was that Tyler's body made the religious sign as if he was a frog-person.

But maybe I'm wrong....

[Jim Shorts]

I liked this story! Maybe there were some plausibility issues with the science and the football (never thought I'd say that sentence!), but overall, I thought it was an enjoyable ride. And I loved the background audio!

I couldn't help but spend most of the story trying to imagine how it would end and how the two threads would come together. I kinda hoped the resolution would be that the frog people would have no choice but to be reborn as whatever sentient lifeforms happened to inhabit the nearest planet. Then one of them would ask the question, "Do you think we'll ever remember our past lives?" to which frog number 2 would reply something along the lines of, "I can't imagine the scenario that would cause that to happen!"

[Nny]

when I discovered this Podcast, I downloaded several stories. this was the first I listened to and it hooked me.
im so glad this was shared to me

[SF.Fangirl]

Okay, I interpreted the ending in a very different way than everybody else.

To me, the lines
"Tyler made the sign of the old ones again, dabbing the second finger of his left hand to his forehead and making the circle. The priests had killed him too, but Una, at least, would be safe"
meant that Tyler had been taken over by Una, so Tyler's mind (but not his body) was effectively killed, and Una (whose mind now inhabited Tyler's body) would survive. For me, the clincher was that Tyler's body made the religious sign as if he was a frog-person.

But maybe I'm wrong....

I interpreted as that Tyler (body and mind) was about to die, but he was still addled enough and enough frog people memories that he was glad that the frog boy Una would be safe. Meaning that some frog people on the ship would live, but nobody in the stadium would.

[SF.Fangirl]

Overall I enjoyed it.  It's not deep, probably forgettable, but fun. I went through several iterations of what I thought was happening before I reached the correct one.  I did definitely feel an "ah ha" when Tyler understood who was being told to evacuate.  I'm enough of a football fan to understand what was happening there, but not enough to notice the errors.  Or it could just be I quickly realized that what was happening on the football field didn't matter to the story and didn't actually pay much attention to it because I really put no effort into "following" the game on the field while listening.

It was a fun one.  And the sound effects were outstanding.  I don't think I would have been confused by the scene changes here, but the effects did not hurt and may have helped.

[El Barto]

I enjoyed this one quite a bit too.  It reminded me a bit of the movie Memento in how I was confused (like he was) about what was really happening.  Was a football player hallucinating about aliens?  Or an alien hallucinating about football players? 

It took a while before I realized both threads were real, and even then I figured the 'real' person was the alien because the descriptions of the football game were so bizarre to me as others have pointed out.

As for crashing straight into Earth, I didn't have any problem with that.  They were heading here for whatever reason and lost their brakes / control at the last moment.  Kind of like when my sister drove her car into the closed garage door by mistake.

The sound effects were awesome.

[Fenrix]

I really enjoyed this story and it was a great way to start my morning. The action was good and the tension was slowly and effectively built on both parts, and the sound effects underscored the growth of the tension nicely. Possibly one of my favorites of the year (I'm about halfway done with 2013). I'm both enough of a football fan and an astrophysics/science-fiction fan to understand what was happening there, but not enough to notice (or care about) the errors.

I don't like stories where the main characters grind away at a deadly situation and then, finally, when all hope seems lost, they dramatically... fail. Because actually all hope was lost.

I saw this differently. This was success (we won the game!) followed by a fall (we're gonna die!) that is made all the more tragic by underscoring the pointlessness of the sacrifices made to reach the prior success. If it was only failure, then I might agree with you.

The thing that bothered me, that Listener didn't touch on, was the lack of player names in the story. We have Tyler and Rollins, and then the aliens all have names, but none of the other players do, neither does the coach. That doesn't feel natural to me at all. I mean, football players know their business and they know their comrades and their opponents. Tyler would not be referring to the linebacker as "Old Number 32." He would call him, Urlacher, or Vrabel, or whatever. Especially if this player is as good as the story makes him out to be, Tyler is going to know him. He also kept referring the the center as "the center". This guy is not only his teammate, but one of the players the QB spends the most time with. Tyler would know his name. The same goes for the coach. He would call him "Coach Harbaugh", not just "the coach".

Basically this lack of familiarity with his teammates and opponents prevented me from feeling like Tyler was a part of this team or had any real connection to them or the game, which in turn made me less emotionally involved in the story.

Actually, I found the lack of names an effective presentation in the short fiction format. Does the Coach really need a name? Does he really get development worth of a name? He's an external force. Same with the guy who keeps breaking through the line to sack the QB. Naming everyone in a short story is a good way to confuse things, especially in audio when you can't easily scan back and see who was who.