Skills you need if you´re thrown back in time

[wherethewild]

This makes me think of The Best Ending to a Roleplaying Campaign Ever, as related to me by the GM.
"Wait, do any of us speak Ancient Egyptian?"

  Good one!

All in all, getting accepted in a monastic order is probably your best bet. It'd be Spartan living, but you'd have a pretty good survival rate, and could possibly get funded for your tinkering.

So´s this. I better include some religious education in my preparation then...

[slic]

There are some interesting papers about the idea that if you go back more than a few hundred years there is no possible way to learn the language.  Just way to many natural changes.  Have a look in the Foreign Languages thread http://forum.escapeartists.info/index.php?topic=775.20
and see how hard it is to figure out the pronunciation of
"Laissez les bon temps rouler"
There is also a book called "The Power of Babel" by Joh McWhortor showing how these changes are really uncontrollable.

The players respond with "Screw that!  We're gonna jump back to Ancient Egypt and take over the world!"

So they load up on guns 'n' ammo and head for the Pharaohs.  And as they're stepping out of their spent machine into the ancient desert, one of the player characters asks:

"Wait, do any of us speak Ancient Egyptian?"

I wouldn't worry too much - the Mongols, Huns, Germanic tribes, etc.  probably didn't know too much Latin, Chinese or other languages.

If I could travel back in time, first I'd really want a very specific time period (+/- ten years) and place, so I could study up first.  How many of us really know the political landscape 300 years ago in England, Japan, Africa?  Doesn't really help to know the generalities of the Battle of Hastings in 1066, even in England.

I would only take "hand-powered" things, nothing that I had to reload.  There are very good chances that even going back 30 years, I wouldn't find the right type of batteries, bullets or ballast, let alone 300. 

Also, don't underestimate a village just taking all your stuff and getting rid of you.  In 12-13th century Europe, strangers usually meant scouts or someone chased out of their own village - neither one good.

Then there's your own immune system (and all the bugs you carry) - I have no idea how well that would hold up, or how many people you might wipe out yourself...

[wakela]

Just throwin' this out there so that we are absolutely clear.

Are there zombies where we are going?

[wherethewild]

Are there zombies where we are going?

Probably only if you land in New Orleans. I was looking at non-Zombie-specific survival needs.

[Thaurismunths]

Just throwin' this out there so that we are absolutely clear.
Are there zombies where we are going?

Dude... there are always zombies where we're going. 

Soap: http://www.sallypointer.com/ironagesoap.html

[Listener]

I think you could go a long way to improving your life expectancy by just using hot water and soap.  If you can make fire, you can boil water.

I have no idea how to make soap

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0137523/

It's a start.

[ClintMemo]

I think you could go a long way to improving your life expectancy by just using hot water and soap.  If you can make fire, you can boil water.

I have no idea how to make soap

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0137523/

It's a start.

No you know you aren't supposed to talk about that. 

[Listener]

I think you could go a long way to improving your life expectancy by just using hot water and soap.  If you can make fire, you can boil water.

I have no idea how to make soap

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0137523/

It's a start.

No you know you aren't supposed to talk about that. 

How do I know you're not in it and therefore it's okay to talk to you about it?

[wakela]

I know this is slightly off topic, but I wouldn't mind an explanation of how we end up in Europe.   If you went through a time hole that only transported you in time, then you would end up in the cruel vacuum of space.   Obviously, this is no fun.  So I'll accept that for whatever reason we wouldn't leave Earth's gravity well, but then that puts us either the same place on the Earth we left from or someplace essentially random.   

So our European friends could find a monastery and hope for the best.  Those in the US will end up trying to ingratiate their monster-lookin ass with some Native Americans.  Being in Japan, I have a feeling I am just plain boned. 

[ClintMemo]

Depending on how far back you want to go,  if you came back as a large group, North America might be a better destination.  IIRC, the population was much lower and you could essentially carve out your own little territory with less opposition. 

[SFEley]

So they load up on guns 'n' ammo and head for the Pharaohs.  And as they're stepping out of their spent machine into the ancient desert, one of the player characters asks:

"Wait, do any of us speak Ancient Egyptian?"

...roll credits.

Solvable problem.  If you're the guys with the guns, the Egyptians learn English.

[Listener]

I know this is slightly off topic, but I wouldn't mind an explanation of how we end up in Europe.   If you went through a time hole that only transported you in time, then you would end up in the cruel vacuum of space.   

And only one time-traveling TV show, to my knowledge, ever addressed how we move through time AND space.

7 Days.

[ClintMemo]

So they load up on guns 'n' ammo and head for the Pharaohs.  And as they're stepping out of their spent machine into the ancient desert, one of the player characters asks:

"Wait, do any of us speak Ancient Egyptian?"

...roll credits.

Solvable problem.  If you're the guys with the guns, the Egyptians learn English.

I'm not sure how far you'd get after "Everyone put your hands up!"  fails.

[FNH]

How about a Printing Press and paper ( or have I gone to the wrong period ).

Or if your mobile, go to the orient and bring Bamboo back to Europe, now that would have been useful.

[slic]

So they load up on guns 'n' ammo and head for the Pharaohs.  And as they're stepping out of their spent machine into the ancient desert, one of the player characters asks:

"Wait, do any of us speak Ancient Egyptian?"

...roll credits.

Solvable problem.  If you're the guys with the guns, the Egyptians learn English.

I'm not sure how far you'd get after "Everyone put your hands up!"  fails.

Shoot the first guy, the others will get it soon the idea.
You think African slaves knew English when they got off the boat?

[Bdoomed]

I think you could go a long way to improving your life expectancy by just using hot water and soap.  If you can make fire, you can boil water.

I have no idea how to make soap

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0137523/

It's a start.

haha i was going to suggest that
lets go steal lipo fat! yea!

Depending on how far back you want to go,  if you came back as a large group, North America might be a better destination.  IIRC, the population was much lower and you could essentially carve out your own little territory with less opposition. 

so THATS how the Native Americans came to be!

[BrandtPileggi]

I'd learn how to refine the coca plant. Then I'd learn how to produce Sodium Bicarbonate. And I would in NO way combine the two...

MWAhahahahaaa

[Roney]

I have no idea how to make soap

Yay!  You've just made an obsessive knowledge of Fight Club into a key survival skill.  Maybe my DVD collection is every bit as important as the little I can remember from my time in the scouts.

So, what did I learn from The Terminator and Aliens?  That James Cameron only made two good films.  The Princess Bride?  ... I don't imagine I'll be in a position to start a land war in Asia anyway.  Star Wars?  Shoot first, second, at the same time: if the director's on your side, you'll live, if he's not, you'll die.

Okay, that's not really working.  Back to Scouting For Boys, I suppose.

[Russell Nash]

Basic first aid.
Hygiene.
Rotating crops, planting in rows, etc.
Basic economics.
School system administration.

I plan on either replacing the local lord or becoming an advisor.

[BrandtPileggi]

I'd learn how to refine the coca plant. Then I'd learn how to produce Sodium Bicarbonate. And I would in NO way combine the two...

MWAhahahahaaa

I lied. I WOULD!

HAAAAHahahaa! Brandt Wins

[Thaurismunths]

Basic first aid.
Hygiene.
Rotating crops, planting in rows, etc.
Basic economics.
School system administration.

I plan on either replacing the local lord or becoming an advisor.

Go for the advisor position: All the power, none of the peasants with torches.

[Russell Nash]

Basic first aid.
Hygiene.
Rotating crops, planting in rows, etc.
Basic economics.
School system administration.

I plan on either replacing the local lord or becoming an advisor.

Go for the advisor position: All the power, none of the peasants with torches.

I slipped right into A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court. 

Twain just gets me.

[Planish]

I could always design a monster trebuchet, but I need some staff (carpenters, blacksmiths, stonemasons, cordwainers) for much of the grunt work. Of course, for it to be useful there would have to be a war going on, and some castles to besiege.

I slipped right into A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court. 

Twain just gets me.

My, what a coincidence. I just paused my iPod in the middle of chapter 26 of A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur's Court to read this thread. I downloaded it from librivox.org.

[Michael]

I thinks one from 1907 would do better in the distant past than one from 2007.  More approachable technology, from a historic perspective.  Ala HG Wells the time machine.

[Thaurismunths]

I could always design a monster trebuchet, but I need some staff (carpenters, blacksmiths, stonemasons, cordwainers) for much of the grunt work. Of course, for it to be useful there would have to be a war going on, and some castles to besiege.

The thing about a monster trebuchet is that you have one so you don't have to go to war.